from the grove

Belief

2012-01-22T08:00:00.001-06:00

When posting yesterday, I caught the last line of the song being played... "Yeah, your sorrow, no it can't save you."

I think I was in 6th grade. I had a social studies test the next day and had forgotten to study. I remember going in to tell my mom and as I started to tell her I just started crying. I don't think I was scared to get in trouble with her, but do remember being surprised that she didn't make a big deal about it and even more surprised that I had cried.

That was the first instance that I can remember where I tied my sorrow/tears over something to my being "saved" from the consequences. And since, have had other instances where my sorrow and tears worked in my favor.

But the lyrics from the song yesterday have struck a cord in my heart as I think about the Lord. How much of this sorrow-saving residue resides in my soul still? Where do I still believe that if I feel bad enough for my actions, that in somehow or way saves me. Because my sorrow doesn't save me when it comes to him.

And how sweet a Savior b/c sorrow still brings guilt. And his kind of saving doesn't.

He doesn't deal with us according to our sin or repay us according to our wrongdoing, because as high as heaven is above the earth, that's how large God's faithful love is for those who honor him. As far as east is from the west, that's how far God has removed our sin from us. ~ Psalm 103:10-12

I read this and hear... "Bring it all to me, Shannon. Take that sorrow for wrong that you carry and hand it over, b/c the way I handle it separates it from you for infinite miles! Do you believe me?"

I, yes, I am the Lord, and there is no other Savior. ~ Isaiah 43:11

Song playing is A Thousand Years, by Christina Perri.

Snow, Yo

2012-01-21T07:48:00.003-06:00

Occasionally my pastor ends sentences with yo, so I can hear his voice this morning saying, "Snow, yo!" That's pretty much all it didn't from noon on yesterday. We still ventured out for a double date nite w/ my brother and his girlfriend, watching Contraband and then going to Chili's for dinner. Here's a snow pile from the Chili's parking lot. (Isn't it pretty, camera phone, yellow snow from the lights pic :)

They do a great job of getting things cleared and just from looking out the window don't think travel today is going to be a problem. Wonder how long this snow's gonna hang around? Last year when we had a snow fall this size it never melted just kept adding to giving us snow cover till spring. I like that in the sense that when the sun is out the snow makes everything shine really brightly. Less of those gray/brown days.

I also got this picture thursday from my mother-in-law, this shining brightly is more my speed no doubt! She called to check on our weather and to relay it was 80 degrees in south Florida.

Weekends are happy no matter where you are, hope yours is a good one!

Song playing is Needtobreathe's - Let us Love

Movie Review

2012-01-07T07:22:00.000-06:00

C's been on vaca this week. I was a little hesitant of how the week might go, me working at home and him here, every day :) but I was surprised at how well it went and how much we enjoyed our routine we quickly adapted.

Part of that routine include a 4:00-ish movie Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday!

Monday we bought tickets to We Bought a Zoo, but got in late and had to sit in the front row not to mention it was so full of kiddos which was to be expected - so we found another movie at that time which was New Year's Eve... Tuesday was Mission Impossible at the IMAX Theater... never done that before and wowzer, worth it! Then Wednesday was Sherlock Holmes.

Mission Impossible was my favorite, then NYE which was still really good i thought, then Sherlock. Not a fan of Sherlock though I liked the ending, I just found myself bored at times throughout it.

C and I are off this morning to a wedding that is 5 1/2 hours away!
I'm bummed he has to go back to work Monday!

Hope y'all have a great weekend!

Our Holiday

2011-12-29T13:48:00.001-06:00

Song playing is Run, by Leona Lewis! One of my faves!

Together

2011-12-25T00:00:00.000-06:00

I've prescheduled this post, so at the time it posts I'll maybe be sleeping or hopefully hanging out w/ family still... but heard this song this week right before heading into the grocery store and wanted to share it on Christmas day... still 3 days away as I write now, but my heart is beyond full at what Jesus means to me, everyday and especially at Christmas. I love the verse below and I'm thankful thankful for the ways over my life I have experienced him as all those things. Merry Christmas and may the love of an indescribably good God be yours today and for always!

Magnify the LORD with me!
TOGETHER let us lift his name up high! ~ Psalm 34:3

A child is born to us, a son is given to us, and authority will be on his shoulders. He will be named Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace. ~ Isaiah 9:6

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-20T21:47:00.000-06:00

katy loves. and Casey Wiegand both posted this fun Christmas Questionnaire and I'm joining in.

1. Egg nog or hot chocolate? Not a big hot chocolate drinker and a definite no to egg nog.
2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Growing up Santa sat all our gifts in our own section, usually near the fire place, unwrapped.
3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? i like white lights outside and colored on the trees - here's ours

4. Do you hang mistletoe? no
5. When do you put your decorations up? I have been so excited for the holidays this year! I put up the decorations (very minimal around here) the weekend after Thanksgiving. The year before I was recovering from surgery and my mom and dad came up the weekend after Thanksgiving and my dad brought up my tree from our storage and helped me decorate it. So sweet.
6. What is your favorite holiday dish? My mom makes this bread called nissua. It is a Finnish bread that her grandma made and she continued the tradition. So yummy!!! I miss being at her home while she makes it because the dough provides some of the best bites!
7. Favorite holiday memory as a child? Christmas Eve... If I had to choose! We'd go to my Grandma's next door for lunch and gifts then we'd just hang out at home and my mom always made tons of appetizers that night... tons! And we'd go to church and sometimes look at lights, but then just come back and eat and play games and friends/family would all be over. Then my mom would give us one present that was always pjs and my brothers would sleep on the floor in my bedroom. I remember going to bed with such a magical feeling, the warmth of the day and anticipation of the morning.
8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? I don't recall.
9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? We normally don't but will be this year!
10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree? already saw my pic... then here are some close-up of the ornaments... my mom gave us hallmark ornaments each year like this one...

... then I do these ornament balls

... and this year, for the first time, I hung about a dozen or so of these unique gold ornaments. Special beyond words to my heart b/c they hung for as long as I can remember on my Grandma's tree, who passed away last December 15th.

11. Snow! Love it or dread it? Like it when it is on the ground and all is white.
12. Can you ice skate? Yes, but it has been a while!
13. Do you remember your favorite gift? I always loved getting Cabbage Patch dolls when I was little and then one year my parents surprised me with a car in the garage!
14. What’s the most important thing about the holidays for you? Being with family
15. What is your favorite holiday dessert? Dirt Pudding and Sugar Cookies with White Icing and MMs
16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? my mom playing kenny roger's christmas record! while decorating the house, stealing nissua dough! Christmas morning breakfast... Calling my best friend after opening gifts.
17. What tops your tree? nothing
18. Which do you prefer: giving or receiving? I love finding the perfect gift that you know someone is going to love.
19. Candy canes: yuck or yummy? Yummy (yummy's a little strong)
20. Favorite Christmas show? Charlie Brown Christmas
21. Saddest Christmas song? ??
22. What is your favorite Christmas song? I love Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree, Jingle Bells, the fast version - that one that goes, "Ja ja ja ja ja ja jingle bells... ja ja ja ja ja ja jangle bells... ja ja ja ja ja ja all the way!!, and this one... Be Born in Me, Francesca Battistelli

Merry Christmas!

Dear Florida,

2011-12-16T00:23:00.000-06:00

I remember the nite that seemed to mark the start of our friendship.
You dropping me off at my apartment with the lingering conversation of our first loves in the air.
You became real to me that weekend. (Was it this weekend too I learned I'm not just 1 but years older than you... still a shocker! It's your wisdom girl, not your looks!)
Before that it was the comings and goings of Sunday and maybe Wednesday worship. I was intimidated, did I ever tell you?
In looking back it doesn't surprise me that it is your worship that still stands strong in my mind 8 years later. That hasn't gone anywhere... so you.

I write because I had a moment tonite, in the midst of listening to Matthew West sing "The Heart of Christmas" at our Christmas concert... and maybe it was the texting we've done this week and you were fresh on my heart... but that song faded out at some point and in its place, for what reason I don't know, the thought of my life without you enveloped me and my stomach sank, my breath must have ceased, for I began feeling my heartbeat in my head. And almost as quickly as it came the thought left and is now marked as a humbling awareness of how great the treasure God graciously buried deeply within me when he gave me you.

And I write tonite to shout it out, my thanks to God for you. This one who I find so easy to lay it all bare for, for she seems to love all of me, good and bad, lifting in my failings and whose presence further grows my joys. How her prayers, not just continue to echo, but powerfully paint pictures for me that so easily fall into my ears depositing for later use, or not so later.

God has gifted you with eyes that see my battles on the horizon and over and over he uses you to prepare me for war. You pursued the new for me in the midst of my shattered, like he gave you a script, and you patiently walked w/ me start to finish, held my hand until my feet could move. Faithfully let go for all the times I had to walk alone. You give unsugar-coated love and encourage without flattery. It's beautiful and real. And you're so often just a hoot... telling it how it is with your "Girl!" and "Whoooaa" or "Stink!"... I can hear you as you share about your children, joking about the trying times, all the while knowing you are a mom who seeks out every last gem God's put in them, sacrifice doesn't scare you.

When you come to mind, I often picture you at your kitchen table, lunch time or your lunch time whenever that might fall with your two busy littles... and you soaking up your convo time w/ God, in his Word and probably I see you there b/c that is what you so often are pouring back out into me.

Such a gift. I am thankful for the dark thought tonite, it sparked this letter, and so awesome the reminder that our friendship flame glows for always.

Love,
Illinois

Indy Christmas

2011-12-13T23:44:00.001-06:00

We had our first family Christmas for 2011 this past weekend... Chad's sister Erin and her husband David came in from London! his brother David and his family in from Virginia too! All his side was there! His Dad invited the whole clan and every one came. He has another sister Tricia, husband Eric who live in Nashville with their two girls and then his other brother, Ryan, lives in Indy w/ Andrea and their little guy Noah. A ball was had by all!

Numbers

2011-12-09T06:07:00.001-06:00

I'm a number person. Maybe it stems from my birthday that was almost all 7s... who knows but I love when numbers work out to be something fun... like my friend that had a baby on 11.11.11 - love it.

Don't think it is news that C and I would love a baby. And most month we are trying but this last month was an unspoken not really thinking about it. We need those too. And so 2 days late now I began to wonder if our not trying month was gonna be our month! I know quite personal but there would only have been one nite this past month that would have made it possible and when I went back realized it was the anniversary of the nite 13 years ago that C asked me to marry him. And being the numbers girl I am I started freaking out a bit, like oh my gosh how perfect!

So of course first thing I did this a.m. was a pg test and only one line. Darn it. I just share b/c I know there are a ton of women out there who go through the waiting and the one lines and often when that happens for me I can never get over how the devotional for that day is SO fitting. And today's was no different.

If there is one thing I learned when C and I were separated it was that God has his reasons. And that instilled deep is one of my life's sweetest gifts from him.

Here is the devotional from Streams in the Desert and song playing is Everything Good by Ashes Remain.

Achieving the Victory

“For this our light and transitory burden of suffering is achieving for us a weight of glory”

(2 Cor. 4:17). (Weymouth)

The question is repeatedly asked–Why is the life of man drenched with so much blood, and blistered with so many tears? The answer is to be found in the word “achieving”; these things are achieving for us something precious. They are teaching us not only the way to victory, but better still the laws of victory. There is a compensation in every sorrow, and the sorrow is working out the compensation.

It is the cry of the dear old hymn:

“Nearer my God to Thee, nearer to Thee,

E’en tho’ it be a cross that raiseth me.”

Joy sometimes needs pain to give it birth. Fanny Crosby could never have written her beautiful hymn, “I shall see Him face to face,” were it not for the fact that she had never looked upon the green fields nor the evening sunset nor the kindly twinkle in her mother’s eye. It was the loss of her own vision that helped her to gain her remarkable spiritual discernment.

It is the tree that suffers that is capable of polish. When the woodman wants some curved lines of beauty in the grain he cuts down some maple that has been gashed by the axe and twisted by the storm. In this way he secures the knots and the hardness that take the gloss.

It is comforting to know that sorrow tarries only for the night; it takes its leave in the morning. A thunderstorm is very brief when put alongside the long summer day.

“Weeping may endure for the night but joy cometh in the morning.” –Songs in the Night

“There is a peace that cometh after sorrow,

Of hope surrendered, not of hope fulfilled;

A peace that looketh not upon tomorrow,

But calmly on a tempest that it stilled.

“A peace that lives not now in joy’s excesses,

Nor in the happy life of love secure;

But in the unerring strength the heart possesses,

Of conflicts won while learning to endure.

“A peace there is, in sacrifice secluded,

A life subdued, from will and passion free;

‘Tis not the peace that over Eden brooded,

But that which triumphed in Gethsemane.”

Driving home...

2011-12-06T20:38:00.001-06:00

...tonite I saw these beautiful lights and...

heard this song by Lindsay McCaul called The Ending. I have her CD and that's what was playing in the car. This is one of my favorite songs. I love the word pending. A good word to picture how our faith is a substance and though what we see w/ our eyes might be pending, it is still very real, very much a done deal. The nite might still be surrounded in dark, but faith knows the lights have been strung on the tree... maybe more trimming needed to add beauty, but the time is coming to flip the switch.

The Ending
To hear the song click here and then click on play symbol next to The Ending.

I would be lying if I said it didn't hurt, just a little
Watching the years go by and knowing your not here
Every confusing situation plays itself out like a riddle
Since I'm being honest, might as well admit my fear

Cuz it seems like ages that I've waited for that feeling, for the knowing
Everyone farther down the road says there's a sign
So I keep on walking, I keep on waiting
Through the heartache and the growing
Cuz baby I know that you'll be worth the lonely times

And so I will wait for you
You know I will wait, til I"m sure that it is you
Cuz I would hate to miss the ending
Of a story that is pending
Until the Author moves, to see our story through.

If I had a dime for every time a well intentioned interventioned
Tried to convince me you were only in my dreams
Well I would be rich but I'd be wishing you could join my celebration
If only to prove I'm not as crazy as I seem

And so I will wait for you
You know I will wait, til I"m sure that it is you
Cuz I would hate to miss the ending
Of a story that is pending
Until the Author moves, to see our story through

And every bend in the road gets my hopes up
That you are just around the corner out of sight
But if it takes a hundred years through the longing and the tears
Rest assured my heart is steadfast day and nite

And so I will wait for you
You know I will wait, til I"m sure that it is you
Cuz I would hate to miss the ending
Of a story that is pending
Until the Author moves, to see our story through

Til the Author moves to see our story through
Til the Author moves to see our story through

173 - 176

2011-12-06T05:28:00.001-06:00

a fun baby shower and pretty flowers i won playing baby bingo, and now have these pretties to look at while I work

Pic by Melissa Jean

this text my dad sent me last thurs. of my nephew b/c he knows i love hearts and him!

this is my view each morning when I open our bedroom door, thankful for the peaceful feeling that always follows... i'm always groggy and venturing from the pitch black of our room and it's still a little surprise each morning to see the calming lights glowing

thankful thankful this little guy is feeling better, he had the throw-ups for about 3 days and was not eating and lethargic, but oh so back to his barking boots self

Song playing is my favorite Christmas song this year! I heard it 3 times on Saturday. I was driving into the garage from running errands and it was playing and I was singing and car dancing - then left a couple hours later for church and the song was playing again on that same station - then! drive into church and the song plays for the 3rd time on a different station -yep it is Christmas time! Song is Rocking Around the Christmas Tree.

See Ya in a Year

2011-11-28T18:18:00.001-06:00

Words from my doc today! Had my final follow up from surgery. It was pointless... in the sense that he was in the room for i'm guessing no more than 5 minutes! But every drive into the city, every elevator ride up to the 18th floor, every visit and all it's ins and outs, I am always more than grateful to know I'm doing it all with the best prognosis I could have hoped for. Thank you, Jesus and thanks again for all of you who dug (and still are) for me... with all your prayers!

I just remembered the firework show I got the nite prior to surgery. I think I put a short ditty on the blog after surgery, but girl was so drugged, and just now I remembered how in seeing them that nite, it felt like God was saying, gonna be ok! And now looking back I'm so grateful at how ok it has been. Good stuff.

The full story was, my mom and dad had come up the nite before and C and I met them in the city for a yummo dinner. And it was on our walk back to the car... C and I were up ahead a bit, holding hands :) when off to our left, just over the buildings across the street, star-like fireworks went off.. just lots of them continuously for 30 secs or so. And C and I knowing our crazy fireworks history, just stopped, caught by surprise and in aw, we kind of chuckled uneasily b/c it just felt like God was speaking right to us.

Playing one of my new favorite catchy songs... We Found Love by Rihanna.

Highlights

2011-11-27T21:25:00.001-06:00

There was a phrase in a worship song this morning, "Who do I say you are? You're everything you say you are." This question and response made the highlight list for the day.

Song playing is What are Words. I remember hearing this song on the radio and it rang true as if God was singing parts of it...

Any where you are, I am near (Philippians 4:5 The Lord is near.)
Any where you go, I'll be there (Matthew 28:20 I am with you Always.)
And I'm gonna be here forever more (Psalm 121 The Lord watches over your coming and going both now and forevermore.)
Every single promise I keep (Jeremiah 1:12 I am watching to see that my word is fulfilled.)
Cuz what kind of God would I be (Song says guy not God)
If I were to leave when you need me most. (Hebrews 13:5 Never will I leave you. Never will I forsake you.)

"What are my words, Shannon, if I really didn't mean them when I said them."

For no matter how many promises God has made, they are "Yes" in Christ. And so through him the "Amen" is spoken by us to the glory of God. ~ 2 Corinthians 1:20

Another highlight today was a sweet lunch and the quiet toast my husband and I had nestled in our corner booth. It was our celebration of this day 13 years ago when he asked me to be his wife. He was so cute today, sharing how he was really nervous that day. He said he knew how he had planned the night to go, but it was nerve-racking b/c I had all the control on how it would really play out. I hadn't realized :)

Thanksgiving Pics

2011-11-25T20:56:00.001-06:00

This is my mother-in-law, Linda. We were at her home w/ her parents and sister, then Chad's brother, Andrea and their little guy Noah. Enjoyed a great meal, too many desserts, lots of laughter and loving on Noah :)

And this was our little Thanksgiving gift from Noah... too cute!

Song play is Things That Matter by Rascal Flatts.

Thankful for Him

2011-11-24T05:17:00.001-06:00

Mr. Lover of my Soul.
Hope all have a blessed day today, safe travel, and a warm time w/ loved ones.

Getting a late start and leaving just this a.m. to spend the day w/ these lovelees...

Enjoyed the Streams in the Desert devotional today.
Song playing is Sing My Love by Kim Walker.

111 - 172

2011-11-22T06:46:00.000-06:00

wed nite drives home from class, love the roads, God's touched me often on those roads
every student I've ever taught
how 6 plus years later, they still come to my heart and make me laugh and sometimes cry cuz they're so special and unforgettable and eternal
overcoming the urge to get a chicken flatbread from taco bell at 9 pm, bad choice avoided
stories in the Bible involving David and Joseph
new sweaters
a free movie from U Verse
down time w/ C watching X Factor, our favorite
pain that has brought me close to Jesus
the promise that he will finish the good works he's begun, Philippians 1:6
belly laughs brought on by my husband
music
heating pads
the song Healer by Kari Jobe
avocados (these make every salad better in my opinion)
good gloves and scarves
my favorite pan - the Green Pan from Crate and Barrel (a little pricey but worth every penny-great gift idea for anyone in the kitchen)
invite to a new friend's baby shower
the worship leaders at our church
all the worship leaders in my life!
an early to bed, early to rise, sweet sleep nite
when I get motivated to organize our house and declutter
my excitement for decorating our place this year for Christmas
spoonfuls of almond butter
morning chats with nieces and nephew
the song Always by Kristian Stanfill
our small group from church, such a gift
my job and all its blessings
the devotional "Streams in the Desert"
gaining wisdom from the book Detox for Women
a sky that transitions morning to evening in beautiful ways
half day work days
our recent increase in double dates!
seeing my husband laugh
safe travel to Washington
cooking with my mom
singing w/ my brother
hot baths
cute boots
that my childhood home is still my parent's home
running my hand down the banister on the stairs at my parents' and having flashbacks
our perfect for us apartment
christmas bonuses
genuine, loyal, and fun coworkers
visiting old friends and brand new babies
laughs with my friend Lorie
dance
prayer
early thanksgiving lunch with family
hearing my dad share his heart at our employee dinner
the people at my parent's church who faithfully keep me in their prayers
God's amazing grace and provision
the song I Belong by Kathryn Scott
the comfy new back support my sil got me for my work chair
the McRae Family
RB's good check up
no glitches in getting my chipped tooth fixed
a 56 degree and sunny forecast for our Thanksgiving in Indy
my last workout today with the trainer
new recipes that become keepers
ps. 34:1-5
the feel of Thanksgiving in the air

Hope yours is a good one.
Song playing is Hold Me by Jamie Grace

Thankful #110

2011-11-17T05:34:00.001-06:00

Molly Kay - Turns 6 years old today.
Thankful for her spunk, God's gift of dance in her, and her young heart of prayer. Prayers for her that each and every gift he's bestowed will grow and come to the fullness it was intended.

I Hope You Dance, playing for the Birthday Girl.

Can't help myself!

2011-11-16T16:11:00.001-06:00

I think he's just the cutest :)
C was playing w/ him this a.m. and I had to stop him to take this pic... bears just sat still and let me. He loves me.

Weekends

2011-11-16T06:06:00.001-06:00

Went to Michigan last weekend with this someone special...

Love this pier. It holds lots of good memories. We went to a comedy show Friday after a dinner at an Italian restaurant. Then Saturday we went to a health seminar and then lunch followed by shopping w/ plenty of eating mingled in. Saturday evening we saw a dueling piano act that came in from Chicago. A guy and girl and the girl was really good! Sunday was breakfast then more shopping and we topped off the weekend with lunch and one big apple crisp dessert for me. Lands!

Next weekend I'm heading to southern Indiana for our annual company dinner. Gonna be a quick trip but so looking forward to seeing my family and some friends. Boots will be coming along for the ride too :)

Doesn't he look thrilled?

99 - 109

promises like, those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy

and I prayed to the Lord, he answered me - freeing me from all my fears (both from Ps. 34)

new blog w/ lots of recipes, elana's pantry

safe travels

group tonite with some fun women

finding the perfect christmas gift

patience with myself when it comes to creating new habits

the sermons we're having lately on change

health
weekends with my mom

thanksgiving around the corner!

Orange and Blue

2011-11-10T16:11:00.001-06:00

Work day just ended. Got up from my chair and opened the curtains directly behind me. The pic doesn't do the real thing justice, the way the sun's hitting the trees right outside our apartment makes the orangy-gold of the tree pop against the gray-blue background. The song for the post, Revelation Song, was playing by chance and the line... "with all creation I sing... praise to the King of Kings," was ringing out. Perty peaceful.

90 - 98
friends who turn to God when their hearts are breaking
not beating my barking dog today, there was unproductive yelling
having my neighbor back from her trip and her always being willing to give me advice on health
making a good choice today when dealing with a situation that has repeatedly frustrated me
for a kind call from the hubs this morning
& his finding humor in me leaving a plate of food in his car & the nasty smell he drove to work w/ at 6 am-oops
for being able to hear God's voice last nite and seeing him work in the small details and how it reminded me, he sees us
hearing my mother-in-law say kind things about my aunt, who she got to spend time w/ recently - and agreeing wholeheartedly
for reminders like the above of how rich I am in the family department!

81-89

2011-11-08T18:04:00.000-06:00

that God know the plans, plans to prosper and not to harm
a highlight and hair cut
a clean apartment
3 fun weekends ahead
growth
sunrises
time tonite to watch some tv i've recorded
a yummy dinner i'm having after a warm bath, my faves
hearing "love come to life" today by big daddy weave

Song playin' is one I currently love hearing Just Fishin' by Trace Adkins.

Antidotes

2011-11-04T05:35:00.005-05:00

Insecure? Inflict damageto your hard outer shell and infuse HOPE from above.

Jealousy – Quiet it into nothingness by seeking hard afterwhat you’re really desiring, PEACE.

Envy. Triumphed by JOY – find it inside of you.

Disappointment? Nothing can remove a loved child of God out of RIGHT STANDING w/him. Shift your eyes. Look that disappointment square,and then up towards the magnitude of the one you still stand with, can’t ever bemoved from. He’s that strong, yesstronger and on and on strong!

Abandoned? Theperfect breeding ground for FAITH. Thatsubstance unseen fostered perfectly when the “seen” goes missing.

Let HOPE do the work of removing every lastinsecurity. Let PEACE surpass thejealousy and JOY dissipate each deadly drop of envy. STAND RIGHTLY w/ the one who’s amazing grace has wiped your ownmucked up slate perfectly clean and abandon yourself to this only time you’llhave to live the life of FAITH.

Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. ~ Proverbs 4:23

#73-80

a spot in the garage

and an elevator in the building

strong mommas

psalm 126

weekends

future plans w/ family

discipline

worship

Song playing, Our God is Greater, Chris Tomlin

Taken

2011-10-26T20:57:00.002-05:00

Perhaps the most beauty I have seen

Lies in your hand, and how it moves for me

It made me and stayed back while I lived carefree

It touched me and told me your love runs deep

I've felt it along a road of learning, seeking you out,

of failings & yearnings

I've mistaken its absence in times when I've prayed

answers not returning but your hand remained

Your hand's uncovered my eyes revealing
The hardest of hearts, my never ending need

In utter heartbreak, your hand, so sweet

held me, consoled deep, lead me to my feet

When darkness grew darker, the desert's final blow

your hand holds out truth, to the promise land I go!

And now in the nothing, no earthly thing on which to lean

I still hold the one and most precious thing

The hand of my Savior, Mr. Everlasting

My heart's cry, "I do," to this song he sings,

"Marry me love, slip on this band

Dance with me always, great things I have planned."

~Anni Lee
7.21.11

Song still playing, Healing is in Your Hands, Christy Nockels.

2011-10-25T16:36:00.002-05:00

Have you ever felt silly praying about the seemingly small issues? And like no one is listening to the dire ones? There is proof that silences both lies.

We are praying to the God who created small things, like tiny beautiful flowers.

He is the one who remembers the tiny sparrows and counts the many hairs on our head...

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed the very hairs on your head are numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. ~ Luke 12:6-7

And from one gamut to the other, for we can rest our biggest worries, lay down the world's largest problems on him as well, remembering he created big things like the Grand Canyon.

I am the one who made the earth and created people to live on it. With my hands I stretched out the heavens. All the stars are at my command. ~ Isaiah 45:12

I am the LORD, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me? Jeremiah 32:27

Step into his Word for sweet promises, step out into his world for proof.

Healing is in Your Hands, playing - by Christy Nockels

Easy Sunday Cooking

2011-10-22T07:41:00.003-05:00

Love letting my crockpot work for me while I'm at church... coming home to the smell of food and a meal mostly ready is a peaceful feeling. It helps too that an afternoon of football or golf is usually on the agenda and both are perfect for putting me right to sleep!

This recipe was one I remember making when we first got married and has been with us ever since. It's from the Fix It & Forget It cookbook.

Creamy Chicken:
Stir together in crockpot:
Can of cream of mushroom
16 oz Sour Cream
1 packet of french onion soup mix
Then press 4 chicken breast down into the mixture.

My crockpot is super fast and hot and I usually only cook this for 4 hours on low and it is perfectly tender. I either serve it over rice, or dice up some potatoes w/ onions, put on baking sheet w/ 2 tbsp olive oil well mixed, add salt and bake at 400 for 25-30 minutes. Stirring around a couple times to keep from sticking. I actually love it best w/ the rice. If potatoes, I like making them up before we leave and then you can just heat them a bit when you get home and wallah, lunch is ready in no time... which works best cuz we are usually hungry right when we get home.

The other easy is Turkey Chili:
Brown 1# ground turkey w/ 1/2 an onion
Add this in a crockpot w/:
2 cans black beans
2 cans chili beans
2 cans corn
Taco Seasoning

I cook this on high for the first hour then low for 3-4. Really good served w/ some broken tortilla chips on top and cheese or sour cream.

Try these easy p.b. cookies for something sweet: (Found this recipe online somewhere while looking for gluten-free recipes and apparently this is one... guess sugar is gluten free!! these are like sugar cookies as much as they are p.b. ones!)

Using an electric mixer, mix 1 cup peanut butter w/ 1 cup of sugar
Add in a beaten egg and 1 tsp baking soda
Place 1 tbsp size balls of the mixture on a greased baking sheet
Score w/ a fork
Cook 10 min at 350

Song playing is What I Love About Sundays, by Craig Morgan.

#63 - 72
the sun streaming in
and the purple sunrise!
spacing my gyn. apt yesterday and them not charging me the no show fee! yeah on both accounts!
that my dad is feeling better, nasty sickness after returning from san juan
my brother-in-law visiting
a good weekend for being outside, supposed to be sunny and 65
ordinary days
p.b. cookies for breakfast :)
being able to live life TODAY
Job's reply to the Lord in Job 42:2 "I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted."

The Power of Support

2011-10-20T16:07:00.000-05:00

We have a burden bearer in Christ...
Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens. ~Ps. 68:19

And in others:
Check out an encouraging post here.

Wheel of the World by Carrie Underwood playing.

Little Recipe

2011-10-18T16:18:00.000-05:00

My new fave snack, and it's been my breakfast so far this week too. I cut the tortilla in half to start and make a top and bottom. Then spread on the honey, almond butter, and top w/ sliced almonds before cutting it in half. 2 almond quesadillas! Sometimes I put sliced peaches in it when I have it for breakfast which makes for a messy but really yummy start to the day.

#53 - 62
heaters
october
movie nite with a friend - Footloose
family humor
a warm hubby to put cold hands on
friends that remember details
being raised in a loving home and how that still brings joy to my soul
luke 15:31 "My son," the father said, "you're always with me, and everything I have is yours."
checking off an overdue item on the to do list
kindness of a stranger

Lay 'Em Down, by Needtobreathe - Song playing - dance away!

Giuliana Rancic

2011-10-17T16:19:00.001-05:00

I'm a fan!
Giuliana and Bill is a show I DVR, so was sad today when my mother-in-law shared the news that she has breast cancer. I then googled her and listened to her share on the Today Show. I love how she can look back in her questioning about God not providing children yet and see his goodness.

Leaves Are Falling

2011-10-14T06:49:00.003-05:00

I caught my breath twice recently. Once in August when out doing one of my slow-paced recovery walks when I noticed the first all orange-leafed tree, and again just the first of this week when I noticed a row of trees half-covered with leaves and half bare. The reason I like spring more than the beautiful colors of fall, b/c those colors fade into winter. And I am not ready for that yet... apparently nature isn't waiting for me to be.

Phone picture from my walk last nite w/ Bears.

River God playing by Nichole Nordeman.

#47 - 52
laughter
light rain that ceases
hunger
an hour chat w/ a friend who knows my soul
small spats with the hubs that turn quickly into apologies and light-heartedness
friday

2011-10-13T06:19:00.000-05:00

At My Feet

2011-10-08T13:41:00.000-05:00

This is what he does when he just comes and stands between my legs. He does this mostly when C and I are talking to each other, which was the case in the pic... or when I'm working at the desk. Other pic is from this a.m. when I was stretching he came and laid on my leg and then in like 2 seconds acts like he's asleep.

#39 - 46

how God brought resolution this week

the gorgeous sunny, mid-80s weather!

fun texts w/ my momma

a handsome hubby

dinner tonite w/ my heart's oldest friend

exercising today, short and sweet

the encouraging world of blogging

healthy Harper Ellison

I'm loving these

2011-10-01T05:41:00.002-05:00

2 songs. Doing a study right now in Genesis and this first song fits so well with it. A reminder of how big the God of all Creation is, that he is, and will be, always and infinitely rediscoverable!

#27-38
early mornings
the most beautiful evening last nite, the sky and the way the sunlight fell on the trees around here was just gorgeous
a breakfast run to panera later - egg and cheese on ciabatta and maybe an oatmeal cookie
nieces and nephews
time
seeing friends later and rooting on the boilers
excitement stirred this morning at the thought of eternity
a coworker's encouragement that lead me to pray
God's continual protection for my ever traveling family
a new friend's story of conceiving after 2 years of many trials and persevering
the crisp air coming in through the slightly opened window and a hot mug of tea
the gift of being a wife and home maker

14-26

2011-09-29T20:38:00.003-05:00

a dog who's repetitively going in and out of my legs as I write this
feeling the strong wind outside
the X factor, loving this
tHe SAVING GrAcE of JeSuS ChRiSt!!!
Hearing the song Call on Jesus driving home tonite and being reminded that all things are possible with Him
the swarm of birds dancing amidst a dreary day of rain
Greta Lane
a surgery that went well for my aunt
a catch me off guard kiss from C
crepes w/ cream and berries dessert
wet hair from a new hair cut
a day with very little in it that I couldn't physically do
a dog whose planted himself right in between my feet, still standing, just still, he's so funny

Song playing is Red Dirt Road, by Brooks and Dunn

1 - 13

2011-09-28T06:16:00.001-05:00

2 sleeps where I can roll over on my sides
meeting an inspiring blogger
making the bed
my health! thank you Lord!
a husband who told me many times this morning he loves me
the reminder this morning to breathe deeply
for michelle and heidi who were here last nite chatting and eating
the loaner car that we can have while ours is being fixed
for the most playful dog ever
a facebook message from Grandpa Martin, rooting on his Tigers!
for a brewing excitement already for the thanksgiving and christmas holidays
for Ps 145:13, the LORD is faithful to all his promises!
an empty fridge that needs stocked

Playing a favorite too... Tracy Chapman's The Promise

Put some points on the board!

2011-09-25T23:00:00.002-05:00

Tremble and do not sin, meditate in your heart upon your bed, and be still. Ps.4:4

I went with a friend Saturday to see Money Ball, a movie about the Oakland A's. In one of the scenes a player, not the typical home run hitter, hits a home run. The thing was he was so used to not that he didn't even realize he'd done so and then happened to trip rounding first base. Upon rising he quickly hurries back to first base thinking he for sure wouldn't have enough time to get to second. It was comical b/c he then realizes he hit a home run and even the other team was cheering him on as he then rounded the bases, experiencing the joy of a leisure lap into home.

I like the above verse and the power it and the above analogy hold when thinking about forgiveness and forgetfulness. Some versions start the above verse..."In your anger do not sin." Anger and hurt over being wronged is often the main thing that keeps forgiveness at bay. This verse beckons us to meditate in our hearts... or, as other verses word it, "search your hearts."

The enemy deceives, as usual, when he can keep us searching outside of ourselves. Even when it comes to being wronged by others or outside circumstances, we still have the choice to search ourselves... and then the kicker... be still, or as others verses put it, "be silent." When silent, we can hear from God and it is often something very worth being still and silent for.

God tells us that how we forgive others is how we ourselves will be forgiven by him. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. ~Matthew 6:14-15

And what is miraculous about forgiveness is the door it opens in our lives to experience the pathway of forgetting. The world's message is often, "Ok, forgive, but never forget." And to do that is to hit the home run of forgiveness and then to trip rounding first and stay there... not realizing the ball is over the fence and you now get the joy of rounding bases celebrating your way home!

That is the power of forgetfulness. It follows forgiveness and is like a soothing balm applied to the burn that removes the sting and heals the wound. It's a continual and repetitive resurfacing process all in preparation for new life.

"I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remember your sins no more." ~ Isaiah 43:25

Definition of forget: fail to remember (dictionary.com)

It isn't as if God really has just forgotten as if he pretends we didn't sin. It is that he chooses, for his own sake! to not remember it... fail to remember... he just forgets it by choice. He's so much more about our future and the good things he's preparing than he is about holding on to the wrongs of our past. It's how he chooses to be. It's who he is.

Don't believe the enemy's lie of forgiveness being the home run, those voices are from the opposing team's dug out! wanting to keep you from gaining real points! Your Leader is standing on home plate cheering you on to points scored! to experience the home run of remembering no more! Which is better... having to stay stuck in the pain of what we forgave? or the possibility of not remembering it at all? God's game plan is good!

Meditating in our hearts... Are we the guy running back to the safety of first base when we've already hit the forgiveness homer? Are we staying there b/c we are afraid to step out and experience the newness of remembering no more? I am this gal at times and I'm writing now because I need reminders of the power of forgetting. Cuz I've also been a gal who's slapped high fives with the Savior as I've slid into home plate... posting remembered no more points on the score board of eternity.

Forget what lies behind and run home.

Song playing is Your Grace Still Amazes Me, by Phillips Craig and Dean.

We have a winner...

2011-09-21T18:08:00.001-05:00

It's Easy

2011-09-19T11:42:00.000-05:00

If you'd like this book for free, leave a comment and I'll pick someone randomly and mail it to ya.

From the iPhone

2011-09-18T17:28:00.001-05:00

Sitting here watching football wondering how easy posting from the phone is. Already don't like cuz can't figure out how to add a photo and wanted to show ya my feet propped up on the coffee table. U should see these slippers, I've worn the sexy way out of them. There are some beautiful flowers on the table too. I am amazed how pretty. They were from pro flowers and were so wilted when delivered I wondered if they were on their last leg, clearly not. C is in the recliner to my left and we've been game watching since church! Yay SC got out of the apartment! I did yesterday too! Drove for the first time in a month! It was gorgeous out here btw! Got pizza delivering soon and will be flipping to the emmy's soon ;)

Worship Him w/ Me

2011-09-13T17:47:00.001-05:00

Wish I could just add this to my playlist but not a choice. I have Christy Nockels as a station on pandora.com and this is the first song that just popped up... i hit pause,and i'm posting the youtube of it... and then will go back and unpause and worship. Believing there will be others join me!

Who is this coming up out of the desert leaning on her lover? ~ Song of Solomon 8:5

Pic Alert

2011-09-08T16:45:00.000-05:00

These are the pretty flowers from 2 weeks ago, that are all dried up. It is kinda a good picture of my environment around here. Things just kind of sitting where they land and staying there, dirty dishes in the sink, dirty clothes in the basket, unmade bed in the morning, I'm still in slow mode. Glad this surgery fell in August this time, b/c at least this place has been getting some lovelee fresh air.

Bible verse I'm loving latelee.. In the past God spoke to our ancestors through the prophets at many times and in various ways, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom also he made the universe. ~Hebrews 1:1-2

It's that last phrase - through Jesus he made the universe. I mean, craziness. I love when a verse makes Jesus SO BIG to me, and he takes the cake in this one.

Speaking of cake :) here's C's 40th cake... w/ 40 candles to which he blew out in one breath, jealousy, boy's got lungs.

Glad tomorrow is Friday. I started back to work this week and sitting and typing has been rough. Will be glad for the weekend break!

Will post my last set of surgery pics... here's the 2 week pics... yesterday was actually 3 wks, but took pics at 2 weeks since that is what i posted from the first surgery. So it looks even better today and less swollen... if only it didn't hurt.

Song playing is The Stand, by Hillsong United.

40

2011-09-03T14:15:00.004-05:00

Tomorrow, September 4th, Chad will turn 40.

The above pic is the magnet I use to post his golf schedule for the week... and one of my favorite little guy pics of him. Here are 40 things I love about him.

1. He has already picked out a girl and boy name that I too happen to just love.
2. He can make me laugh like no other.
3. He cut a patch out of his hair once, by accident! Like a 1" square!
4. He knows what it is like to have to physically take care of his wife and does it w/o much complaining :)

Family pic of us after my first surgery last November.

5. He purchased, cooked, and cleaned our entire Thanksgiving meal last year! Here he is in action!

6. He shows his love by buying me gifts.
7. He is passionate about the things he loves.
8. He loves Purdue!
9. He loves music! I'd say country is his favorite.
10. He prays for me.
11. He has watched countless chick flicks because I love them.
12. We both love a good meal.
13. He provides well for us.
14. I'll never forget his first practice round in CA, he was meant to be in golf. And it wasn't until then that I realized how miserable he must have been - 7 years behind a desk.
15. He never stresses... this drives me crazy as equally as I love it, ok more than I love it!
16. He wants to have children.
17. He will be a loving and present dad. I cannot wait.
18. Huge fan of our dog, Rowdy Boots!

19. He is life to my routine bones and loves to have a good time.
20. We share a love for all food, our favorite... Mexicana!
21. He loves living near Chicago b/c he LOVES all the sports, Bears, Cubs, Blackhawks... not to mention the concerts! Here we are at a Bears game and Cubs game from last year, and then him w/ 2 guys from Rascal Flatts. Then recently went w/ his friend, Chris, to take Chris' daughter to meet Taylor Swift.

22. He holds my hand often.
23. If he feels like kissing me in public, he does.
24. He surprised me with a trip to NYC for my 30th... a place I'd always wanted to go.
25. He trusts me with his secrets.
26. His proposal to me was the best, and very romantic!
27. He is my best friend.
28. I'm extremely proud of him for the fears he has overcome.
29. He is such a softy at heart.
30. He loves his nieces and nephews. Here he is with his nephew Noah, then C on his 36th b-day with Gunnar, Lily, & Molly.

31. He loves to bless others.
32. I love when he walks out in the morning, ready for work... he always looks handsome and smells so good.
33. He texts me often, just because.
34. Looking forward to the trip he is planning for our 12 year anniversary this December.
35. He has a way of easily making friends and isn't intimidated by what people do or who they are... he is just himself no matter who he is with.
36. He is super competitive and athletic.
37. I cannot wait to see what our children will be like.
38. I love that he taught himself to play the guitar.

39. He's really smart.
40. He has the world in front of him and I am looking forward to seeing what it holds!

Through life's journey, you have made me a stronger woman, Chad, and I'm grateful.
Hope you feel loved on your 40th!

w/ his momma, July 2011

Honey Bee by Blake Shelton playing for the post.

Bears

2011-08-30T20:13:00.002-05:00

He's been following me around relentlessly. Had my legs propped up on this pillow the other day and was texting when I felt him jump on the couch plop down... he is just so cute to me and I love him more than I'd ever have thought I could love a dog.

Went to the doc yesterday and he said I'm doing great! I'm still taking a pain pill about every 8-12 hours just to take the edge off. Recovering hasn't been fun, but I've had lots of love in the process and reminders of how much I have to be thankful for.

Here's some more pics of the loving :)
Balloons from C and a new bed that goes up and down... it has been the best thing!!!!

My mom and dad were the ones who stayed with me the most while downtown in the hospital. They were there every day. Hence my momma had shopping time so I got...

She also mailed me a sweet card and this bird. She knows how I love birds cuz they remind me of my grandfather.

My mother-in-law came and stayed w/ me my first week back. She was a big help buying us groceries, making special lunch runs and keeping me company which did much for me mentally. She did laundry one day and in doing so organized C's side of the closet, cuz I asked her too. C wasn't too hip on that, but I love me an organized closet.

Fruit from Ryan, Andrea, and little Noah

Flowers from friends...

A book from my friend Abbi... who laughs at me and her hubby who are both the "tight" ones in the relationships - she sent it for a laugh, kind of but she knew I'd like it.

A gift on my door from the neighbor across the hall...

Love the cards that came, the "thinking of you" texts, and the calls - the prayers said are priceless.

Other loving things done:

My oldest friend in the world, friends since we were little, lives in this city and stopped in one nite to see me in the hospital. My friend down the hall has walked our dog and made cookies for me to take to my surgeons on the follow up visit! And then my friend Kelli, who is induced Thursday this week w/ baby #3!!! took time to make us 3 different meals! My momma came last friday too... just for 3 hours to make us more food. And I have a visitor coming to see me over the weekend, my brother Kurt.

Song playing is Known, by Audrey Assad.

It's Official!

2011-08-23T17:21:00.001-05:00

Got the call from the surgeon... "You're a girl with lots to be happy about," he said!!! Benign schwannoma, which is a nerve tumor that is not cancerous! Lovelee. My grandma's comment was, "Get down on your knees and thank the Lord." Yes ma'am!

Pics from the hospital... got some cookies from Chad's boss, and second is the view from my room, that's Lake Michigan out there!

"Your Name," by Paul Baloche is playing.

Fireworks & Pic Alert

2011-08-23T01:37:00.002-05:00

I've shared on here before my thing with Fireworks... God has shot them off for me at the most random times for fireworks, but at major transitional times in my life... so I have Tuesday, August 16th and Wednesday, August 17th to add to his showing off list. A peace flooded me Tuesday nite as the fireworks... all were like shooting star ones this nite... went off in our path. I don't know the feeling, it was out of body kind of. Blessed? I don't know the word.

Surgery went well! Found the mass! Was about the size of the top half of the surgeon's thumb and was connected to the sympathetic nerves. Here is an incision pic from Sunday, (surgery was Wednesday).

They didn't have to go all the way to the belly button, but went around the side just a tad more this time. Also cut me below the belly button but this was just from rubbing of some sorts during surgery. They had to remove my 10th rib to get to the mass! Accidentally punctured the right lung doing that too, so had some stitches there but no further complications.

The surgeon took a frozen section at time of surgery and felt this is a benign nerve mass. I should get the complete pathology on it today. I take pain meds every 3 hours and as of yet can't seem to go much past that. I see the doctor Monday for a follow up. Grateful for the love of my family, friends, all the prayers and such a good report!

Here's the post with other firework showings :) and song for post is my favorite hymn... "Be Thou My Vision."

Surgery Soon & Tummy Pic Alert!

2011-08-15T22:04:00.000-05:00

Wednesday is surgery day. It is set for 12:30, but I find out for sure tomorrow if that times stays, I'm guessing it will.

Thanks for all the prayers.

I was in my home town just this morning and ran into a couple I've known since I was a little girl b/c they've always gone to the same church as my parents. We hugged in the order line at McD's and she preceded to say... "I've been praying for you every day, your surgery is Wednesday, right?" I cried... it just means so much to know people pray. Her husband's words, "You're gonna be just fine," have stayed with me all day.

Here is a pic from my first surgery, November 9th, 2010... this was 3 days afterwards. This surgery they are probably going to go in in the same spot, but doctor said hopefully not as big of an incision.

Here is a 2-week after picture:

And here is a current one I just took for this post:

I'll give ya another "tummy alert" heads up when I post my 2nd surgery pics. Thanks again for the prayers! Keep them rolling all day Wednesday!!

Ask Anything!

2011-08-05T06:50:00.002-05:00

Our church just finished a 4 week "Prayer Festival." For the last 4 Thursdays, ladies have met, worshiped, been encouraged, prayed, and enjoyed food and friends. Last nite's speaker ended with a neat exercise on one way to pray through scripture. She picked Matthew 20:29-34. We read it 3 times total doing something different each time.

First time: Just read it for the reading of it.
Second time: Pray prior asking God, through the Holy Spirit, to highlight what he wants to say.
Third time: Read and focus in on what God showed you from the second reading and then pray regarding that.

As Jesus and his disciples were leaving Jericho, a large crowd followed him. Two blind men were sitting by the roadside, and when they heard that Jesus was going by, they shouted, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!”
The crowd rebuked them and told them to be quiet, but they shouted all the louder, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!”
Jesus stopped and called them. “What do you want me to do for you?” he asked.
“Lord,” they answered, “we want our sight.”
Jesus had compassion on them and touched their eyes. Immediately they received their sight and followed him. ~ Matthew 20:29-34

It was so cool and I was amazed at the end of reading it 3 times how much more God does seem to speak when I just give him the time. God highlighted:
going by: Jesus is not necessarly stagnant and just sitting waiting for us to get with his agenda... he has his agenda and the men in these verses grabbed hold of him while they could
shouted: Their desperate need far outweighed their care of man. They needed Jesus and didn't care who stood in their way, they were going after him.
stopped: this kind of boldness and out of society norm behavior caused Jesus to stop and speak directly to them
want: Jesus wasn't concerned with anything else except what they wanted... he stops for the sole reason of giving them their heart's desire... so good!
sight: These men were blind and had to live life on the earth without the pleasure of seeing. I love how they weren't afraid to be so personal and intimate with the Lord, trusting in his goodness to care about all things. And in their believing Jesus gave them what they asked for immediately.

If I had to pick just one main thing God said to me through his Word, it is go after your needs being met with all your heart. My friend earlier in the nite had given this verse:

Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete. ~ John 16:24

Give it a try. With these same verses or any others. And in the praying, don't forget to ask anything!

August 1

2011-08-01T06:51:00.001-05:00

The year is just a moving by! August 1 already!

Loved the Streams in the Desert devotional this morning...

You Can Trust

“Surrender your very selves to God as living men who have risen from the dead” (Romans 6:13). (Weymouth)

I went one night to hear an address on consecration. No special message came to me from it, but as the speaker kneeled to pray, he dropped this sentence: “O Lord, Thou knowest we can trust the Man that died for us.” And that was my message. I rose and walked down the street to the train; and as I walked, I pondered deeply all that consecration might mean to my life and–I was afraid. And then, above the noise and clatter of the street traffic came to me the message: “You can trust the Man that died for you.”

I got into the train to ride homeward; and as I rode, I thought of the changes, the sacrifices, the disappointments which consecration might mean to me and–I was afraid.

I reached home and sought my room, and there upon my knees I saw my past life. I had been a Christian, an officer in the church, a Sunday-school superintendent, but had never definitely yielded my life to God.

Yet as I thought of the darling plans which might be baffled, of the cherished hopes to be surrendered, and the chosen profession which I might be called upon to abandoned–I was afraid.

I did not see the better things God had for me, so my soul was shrinking back; and then for the last time, with a swift rush of convicting power, came to my innermost heart that searching message:

“My child, you can trust the Man that died for you. If you cannot trust Him whom can you trust?”

That settled it for me, for in a flash I saw that the Man who so loved me as to die for me could be absolutely trusted with all the concerns of the life He had saved.

Friend, you can trust the Man that died for you. You can trust Him to baffle no plan which is not best to be foiled, and to carry out every one which is for God’s glory and your highest good. You can trust Him to lead you in the path which is the very best in this world for you.–J H. McC

“Just as I am, thy love unknown,

Has broken every barrier down,

Now to be Thine, yea, Thine ALONE,

O Lamb of God, I come!”

“Life is not salvage to be saved out of the world, but an investment to be used in the world.”

Song playing is by Tenth Avenue North, "Strong Enough to Save."

Random Alert

2011-07-30T07:24:00.003-05:00

This post has come about for some pretty serious reasons, just one actually, i want to change the background. Is this weird?

I've always loved little change like this. I remember loving! i mean loving when I had grade school teachers who moved our desks often. And same with my momma who loved moving furniture around and walls and rooms etc, love her. I'm a bit more tame than her when it comes to where change takes me :)

Growing up I had this bulletin board in my room. I put school pics, medals from gymnastics, notes, whatever on it, and decorated it and loved changing and rearranging it and pretty much anything else in my room. Even now, I'm amazed at the renewed sense of go! I have when I just rearrange or clean my work desk, or switch things up around the house.

I'd call my self a controlled changer though. Cuz unplanned changed is not my thing, but controlled changed, that is.

This has more to do w/ control than change, but also loved laying out my clothes for the next day, shoes, earrings, what was going in my hair, you name it... I don't remember doing this often, but do remember going to bed at least once with my bed made, showered, and ready with my clothes on for the next day. I have to chuckle at myself. Now a days I count myself pretty productive when I make my bed first thing.

I was just thinking the other day about another thing I often did growing up. When I couldn't fall asleep at night I would turn my bed into a gymnastic mat and do all kinds of exercises. I'm laughing harder at myself. I would even turn on the radio really low sometimes.

Speaking of radios... my momma, in what at that time was her living room which is now a dining room/family room :) had this really large stereo... the ones with the stereo in the center - which at that time probably wasn't a lot shorter than me, and then the 2 side speakers that were just as big. I'd come home after school, most often eating either an oatmeal cream pie or coolwhip straight from the bowl and then loved playing her stereo and dancing around that light blue ~~stage~~ room.

This random post all because a new background for the blog was desired. Maybe it was my carrot and pear juice I made this morning, C swears my all blueberry breakfasts make me crazy like this.... fruity. I'm laughing again, maybe it is the juice?

Any guesses who we are going to see tonite? Playing Sister Christian for the post... Night Rangers, Foreigner, and Journey! Quite another blast from the past :)

Remembering

2011-07-25T06:02:00.004-05:00

Just remembering how good God was to heal both of my brothers from accidents they had on this day. Here is an old post, from 2008 that tells the story.

THURSDAY, JULY 24, 2008

Pickin' Brothers

For at least a few years now, July 25th has been a special day of feeling extra thankful for my two brothers. My brother, Kevin, was in a camping accident on July 25th, 1998 and my older brother, Kurt, was in a motorcycle accident July 25th, 2004.

Kevin sustained multiple areas of bleeding and damage to his brain and, following the surgery to relieve pressure on the brain, laid in a coma for four days. But awoke and defied medical odds as he regained facial movement from nerves that shouldn’t be working and could walk and talk and today is the Kevin we’ve always known and loved, minus the loss of hearing in his left ear and partial in his right. Kurt too endured a not-so-fun recovery with a broken (more like crushed) foot, torn ligaments in both knees, and a broken wrist and pelvis.

I love these two like mad and I’m so thankful that their accidents caused only a season of pain and not a lifetime of loss. That today... I talked with my younger brother about work, and tonight I’m actually typing this post from my older brother’s home where I’m staying for the night.

I’ve posted 2 pictures. Thank you Jesus for the sweet sweet gift of healing!

Sing to the LORD a new song, for he has done marvelous things. Psalm 98:1

And playing, for this post, a new song for me... heard it yesterday while out walking RB.

Trust, by Kristene Mueller.

Will you dig a hole for me?

2011-07-23T13:58:00.005-05:00

I recently heard a woman speak on Mark 2:1-12 where Jesus heals the paralytic man. In the story, four men carry their friend to Jesus and seeing the place was packed, took him up to the roof and dug a hole so they could drop him down to Jesus. She focused in on that word "dug." She pointed out from vs. 5 that Jesus saw the faith of all of the men, not just the man who needed to be healed. And she used that to encourage us in praying for others.

Well I am "sick" just like that man. And I do need to be carried to the roof and a big hole dug so I can be dropped right into the arms of Jesus, that he can have his way with me!

There is a mass that sits near my right kidney. I have seen 3 specialists, a GI surgeon, a kidney surgeon, (not sure the technical name), and an oncologist. All 3 doctors agree this mass needs to come out. And the oncologist ran an MRI and a PET scan. The good news being the mass hasn't changed since some prior scans I had done. And the PET scan showed only minimal metabolic activity in just the location of the mass. The oncologist said he would guess this is a low-grade sarcoma, but that is just his guess and cannot be for sure unless it is removed.

Here is a pic (taken from this site). The mass is between the right kidney and the inferior vena cava, and then right below the the artery and vein shown that run to the kidney. I saw the CT of the mass at one of the surgeon's offices and my kidney actually tilts in more at the bottom, toward the spine, and the mass just fills up what appears to be a space right there in that area.

Because of it's location, I'm going to have a the GI surgeon, the kidney surgeon, and a vascular surgeon all present during the surgery. It is scheduled for August 17th at Northwestern.

So many times when I pray, I pray an outcome for God to meet. The visual with the friends digging through the roof is much better because it is the reminder that prayer isn't as much about praying a specific outcome, it is about digging through (fighting the spiritual battle that we cannot see) with the main goal being to just present our friend to Jesus. That sounds like heaven and why I'd ever be afraid to ask for this I don't know... asking you to carry me in prayer to Jesus. Helping me dig when I can't.

I've often thought it and heard it expressed through others how much more faith I seem to have when praying for other people's situations. It is like I just have so much more belief that God will do it! But then when I pray for myself it can easily just seem like one big mud pile! How good it is to hand off my burdens letting the faith of others carry them for me. Heartfelt excitement and thanks to anyone who, after reading this, picks me up and starts digging.

And while I'm weak in carrying myself in regards to this burden of mine, I promise strength arises if you were to share your burden with me... I'd have a God-given faith that would allow me to carry your burdens and dig for you too.

Song playing is, "The Rose."

Thanks

2011-07-19T06:26:00.007-05:00

My husband and I went to bed last nite going through the alphabet and giving something we were thankful for that started with each letter.

A... he said airconditioner
B... I said Barebones (which is the gym where we work out)
C... he said Crossfit (which is also the gym where we work out)
Then I said... F... French fries

He's like, "French fries! What happened to D and E..."
Hilarious, I do stuff like this, guess I was hungry.

We made it to O and Chad said, "Oli... do you like that name... Oliver and call him Oli." I did like it and got excited with my idea to finish the alphabet giving names we like that start with the letter.

P... I said Paige, he said Pia
Q... I said Quinn, he said Quinn
R... I said I didn't have an R and he said Reece

And so it went, after Z... he started back with A (which I thought was the sweetest) and we went all the way through to the O where we started. I loved it and went to bed with such a full heart. I love thinking about names and I love thinking about having a baby. I could almost feel him/her in my arms after that game.

Faith is believing in what you cannot see. And I do have faith for a baby despite not seeing the when and how of it. But faith is teaching me that is not my job anywho... mine is just to love the giver and never give up.

A Call to Trust the Lord:
"I, even I, am the one who comforts you. So why are you afraid of mere humans, who wither like the grass and disappear? Yet you have forgotten the LORD, your Creator, the one who put the stars in the sky and established the earth. Will you remain in cowering dread of human oppression? Will you continue to fear the anger of your enemies from morning till night? Soon all you captives will be released! Imprisonment, starvation, and death will not be your fate! For I am the LORD your God, who stirs up the sea, causing its waves to roar. My name is the LORD Almighty. And I have put my words in your mouth and hidden you safely within my hand. I set all the stars in space and established the earth. I am the one who says to Israel, 'You are mine!'" ~ Isaiah 51: 12-16

Song playing is, "Here In My Life," by Hillsong.

Country

2011-07-16T07:39:00.000-05:00

I remember hearing this song playing, Trisha Yearwood's She's In Love With The Boy, one day while listening to the radio in my bedroom... I was in high school and just loved it! This was really the only country I liked, wasn't much into it. Do remember going to an Aaron Tippin concert with a friend and that was fun. But other than that, don't remember much country in my life before college.

In college I met Myra... who loved all country and her love was contagious... so from then on... I've been a fan and my love for the genre has only grown. It is just so down to earth, and funny at times, and I don't think any other type of music takes the everyday stories of life, covering such a large gamut, and sets them to music as well as country does.

C and I had our very first date going to see Shania Twain perform. And since moving to Chicago, we pretty much plan our summer to include 3-4 concerts, not all country, but most. And tonite we are off to see Tim McGraw... "Like tomorrow was a gift, and you got eternity to think about what you'd do with it." I'm pretty excited about his openers too... Luke Bryan and The Band Perry! I'll be singing "You lie like a priceless Persian rug on a rich man's floor," - all day tomorrow! That song sticks in my head!

Can't decide if I'm taking the camera, but will post some fb pics if I do.

Because of Trust

2011-07-11T05:27:00.006-05:00

Unbelief looks at God through the circumstances, just as we often see the sun dimmed by clouds or smoke. But faith puts God between itself and its circumstances, and looks at them through him. (From Streams in the Desert ~ July 11)

Open the gates that the righteous nation may enter, the nation that keeps faith. You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD is the Rock eternal. Isaiah 23:2-4

Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this; He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Psalm 37:3-6

Stand by You playing... sung by Gina Glocksen.
Picture from Jax Beach, FL Oct. 2009

Robert Graber

2011-06-29T23:08:00.000-05:00

Was walking in to get ready for bed and saw this...

I snapped 3 shots before he growled, so not like him, and then gave me this...

It is so like him to love his sleep and Mr. Moody must not have liked the flash.

Robert Graber is name of the moment... C for some reason a few weeks or more back now started calling him Robby Boots... which turned into Robert which we both find really funny - and then 2 nites ago C and I were playing with him and I called him "gray Bears" cuz since getting his hair cut you can really see the gray in his coat. Then gray bears became "Graber" and Robert Graber quickly followed... this poor dog.

Song of the Moment - SING MY LOVE!

2011-06-25T08:17:00.000-05:00

Was flipping through my husband's iPod early this week, which is hooked up to play in our car... and saw this song title and it stuck out to me... "Sing My Love." Played it and been playing it over and over everywhere I drive... with some country and a whole mix of other songs in between :)

But I know the song title got me cuz verses with singing have been the ones that seem to speak to my heart lately. Such power in praise cuz such power in the one we are praising!

Psalm 118:14 The LORD is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation.

Exodus 15:1-3 I will sing to the LORD, for he is highly exalted. The horse and its rider he has hurled into the sea! The LORD is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise him, my father's God, and I will exalt him. The LORD is a warrior. The LORD is his name.

A writing from Annie Johnson Flint: (Taken from Streams in the Desert - June 25 Entry)

Have you come to the Red Sea place in your life,

Where, in spite of all you can do,

There is no way out, there is no way back,

There is no other way but through?

Then wait on the Lord with a trust serene

Till the night of your fear is gone;

He will send the wind, He will heap the floods,

When He says to your soul, "Move on."

And His hand will lead you through - clear through -

Ere the watery walls roll down,

No foe can reach you, no wave can touch,

No mightiest sea can drown;

The tossing billows may rear their crests,

Their foam at your feet may break,

But o'er the seabed you will walk dry ground

In the path that your Lord will make.

In the morning watch, 'neath the lifted cloud,

You will see but the Lord alone,

When He leads you on from the place of the sea

To a land that you have not know;

And your fears will pass as your foes have passed,

You will be no more afraid;

You will sing His praise in a better place,

A place that His hand has made.

Exodus 15:11 "Who among the gods is like you, O LORD? Who is like you - majestic in holiness, awesome in glory, working wonders?

Philippians 4:6: Don't worry about anything. Instead tell God what you need, and thank him for all he's done!!!

Gold

2011-06-14T17:26:00.000-05:00

I think I'm a late player in this game, but I remember being in the bottom of the Grand Canyon, early in 2010 and just awestruck by the trees around me. After seeing the "Gold" prompt from the "3 ~ from here & there" blog, it was the first picture that came to my mind - b/c even more than the picture, the fall feeling felt when I snapped this picture had a "golden" feel to it.

The neatest thing about hiking the canyon this trip was how at different points along the hike from top to bottom then back up, I seemed to walk through every season.. there was hiking through snow at the top and hot spots where the jackets were off, and then fall-like wonder. It was all beautiful.

Song playing is Carrie Underwood singing, "How Great Thou Art."

Noah

2011-06-13T16:24:00.000-05:00

Here's some recent pics of our nephew, Noah, who turned 3 on Saturday.

Forget Me Not

2011-06-11T04:55:00.001-05:00

he, who forgives all our sins
he, who heals all our diseases
he, who redeems our lives from the pit
he, who crowns us with steadfast love and mercy
he, who satisfies all our desires with good things,
so that our youth is renewed like an eagle.

~Ps. 103:2-5
Song playing is Beautiful Things by Gungor.

It's a journey :)

2011-06-10T16:35:00.005-05:00

Just got off the phone w/ my momma and she mentioned this from the June 7th post in the Jesus Calling devotional by Sarah Young. (She writes as if it is Jesus speaking.)

Who is in charge of your life? If it is you, then you have good reason to worry. But if it is I, then worry is both unnecessary and counterproductive. When you start to feel anxious about something, relinquish the situation to me. Back off a bit, redirecting your focus to me. I will either take care of the problem myself or show you how to handle it. In this world you will have problems, but you need not lose sight of me. (Luke 12:22-31; John 16:33)

Had my friend Abbi send me a little ditty this week too and part of it said...

Worry less.
Believe more!

Two women I treasure passing along some wisdom!

Sunrise

2011-06-07T06:12:00.002-05:00

Here's this morning's sunrise...

... and also wanted to share this testimony from church Sunday. If you have time to check it out. I know you'll be blessed by the power of God in his story.

Alex Calloway Video

Violin Lessons

2011-06-04T09:36:00.010-05:00

2 summers ago (wow can't believe how fast time goes!) I bought a violin and started lessons.

I no longer take lessons... when I hurt my back last May, I couldn't hold the violin so I stopped the lessons and haven't restarted. And I'm gonna share that the 9 months of lessons barely put a dent in my ability to play... it wasn't pretty... but it was far from a waste, b/c sweet lessons for my soul have stuck with me.

I approached the learning of this instrument with desire and arrogance. How hard can a four-stringed instrument be? Hilarious. And so it is with the ways of God... I can read about them in his Word and in so many instances think I'm just going to "put my mind to it" and wallah! I'll do it. Like being patient, or kind, or dedicated, or gentle, forgiving... words that I understand in my head and then can't easily reproduce with my actions. The desire is there and so too the arrogant thinking that learning the ways of the Creator of the Universe is just going to be easy.

My violin teacher had been playing since she was very young and she could take my song for the week, some very easy piece and when she played it, make it sound wonderful. It would give me hope that as I practiced I'd be able to make easy pieces sound good.

No matter how far along on the road you are with your walk with Jesus, there are those who have studied him more and sat with him longer. As we watch their journey we can gain encouragement that we too will be able to play out our songs with more ease as we continue to persevere in our own learning of him and sitting with him. No matter how short of a time you've known him, you too have the gift of encouraging others to join you. We can just relax and and enjoy our journey of knowing him. For even the most amazing, devoted theologians and followers, when compared with God's eternal ways will not really have made a dent... "I tell you the truth, of all who have ever lived, none is greater than John the Baptist, yet even the least person in the Kingdom of Heaven is greater than he is!" Matthew 11:11

As I practiced this most amazing instrument... disappointment would come easily. How could my head know what to do and my hands not be able to do it. Ultimate frustration. I was no match for this instrument and it's power over me was immediately clear. Patience was a must if I was going to persevere. I couldn't just expect myself to learn this new instrument without practice, and without truly rejoicing at my own progress... however small that might be. Some weeks it was just playing through my small piece without stopping... no matter how bad it squeaked out. Whatever the accomplishment, I had to learn to rejoice in that and be patient with the mountain high and seemingly ever-growing list of things I couldn't begin to do.

Oh how I wish I could apply this same thinking to my relationship with Jesus. He is so vastly more complex! So rejoice in him in all things... those little successes... let them spur me on to more hope, and not be so overwhelmed by the growing ways in which I am not like him. How arrogant and prideful to really believe my goal is to get close... stop the striving I tell myself over and over... God is Big. Beyond my big... rest and rejoice.

The violin taught me the only real error I could ever make when it comes to growing is to give up. The Lord is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. ~Psalm 118:14

Living here in the middle... between the cross and the eternity God promises... learning of this one who makes all things new... it is far from simple. Yet when we fix our eyes on him... on how infinitely infinite his ways are... we can relax... be patient with ourselves because we know from experience, the more lessons we receive from this Teacher... the more majestic we see him to be, and gently he allows the distance between who we are and who he really is to stretch even wider, because it must and though our hearts should faint, by his grace we gain strength.

Song playing is "Somewhere in the Middle," by Casting Crowns.

It is clear, then, that God's promise to give the whole earth to Abraham and his descendants was not based on obedience to God's law, but on the new relationship with God that comes by faith. So if you claim that God's promise is for those who obey God's law and think they are "good enough" in God's sight, then you are saying that faith is useless. And in that case, the promise is also meaningless. But the law brings punishment on those who try to obey it. (The only way to avoid breaking the law is to have no law to break!)

So that's why faith is the key! God's promise is given to us as a free gift! And we are certain to receive it , whether or not we follow Jewish customs, if we have faith like Abraham's. For Abraham is the father of all who believe. That is what the Scriptures mean when God told him, " I have made you the father of many nations." This happened because Abraham believed in the God who brings the dead back to life and who brings into existence what didn't exist before. ~Romans 4:13-17

5K & Someone Special

2011-05-28T08:37:00.002-05:00

Ran my first 5K last nite. Doesn't a 5K sound better than 3.1 miles? It took me 39:27. But I never stopped running. Would have helped if the head phones I brought would have stayed in my ears, but after about 200 meters of fiddling with them, they went into my pocket. Which of course left me with just the cool nite and my thoughts for the next 35 minutes. C was already way ahead by this point!

I was pretty good the first 2 miles probably but then the last mile, had to set up little mental markers in my head to celebrate.... the first one was making it to this drive... woo hoo, then the corner, woo hoo, then the light pole, then the cul de sac, and on and on it went.

Guess what I'm doing at 11? A massage :)

Happy Memorial Day! Leaving ya with a picture of my grandpa, Bert Jones. This is my dad's dad. He passed away when I was 5 so I don't remember him, but someone came in to the Washington Jones and Sons this past Thursday with this picture of my grandpa from when he served in the U.S. Navy.

Playing the song that was stuck in my head all day yesterday. "No Woman No Cry." My favorite line, "Everything's gonna be alright!" Philippians 4:6 Don't worry about anything, instead pray. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he's done.

Felt like Friday

2011-05-19T19:55:00.002-05:00

only cuz I'm off tomorrow... woo hoo
but today was a wonderful thursday so not gonna go wishin' it away
had 2 sweet calls from friends today
and treated myself after dinner tonite
to a trip to Mc D's for their
strawberry sunday parfait...
don't get started
i think it is available
for a limited time
only, or at least
i hope

playing my favorite song of the moment, beauty of the cross, for my short and sweet post
gonna play it while i do up dishes and pack - off to our weekend in Nashville for the wedding, say a prayer for our 6:45 am flight tomorrow :)

Saturday...

2011-05-14T08:48:00.003-05:00

... in the dark, I think it's gonna rain here all day. he he
at least it looks a possibility but not hit the weather app yet and the way it's been reporting can't hardly put much weight behind it, last weekend was 60% chance of rain on Sat and we got nothing... woo hoo

My parents were here last weekend. C had to close Friday, so I went to the city to meet my parents for dinner and saw this show... Cirque Eloize Id. I purposely brought my camera to take pics but no pics allowed. Here are a few of the city.

Saturday we participated in Cinco de Mil-o - which was a 1 mile run intermixed w/ other exercises at various markers... this was through the gym where C and I work out. The run part of it wasn't hard, the exercises in between were.

I think our favorite part was the bear crawl... it was in this big section of field and you got into a position like a V with your feet and hands both on the ground and then walked/waddled your way down to an orange cone (I was spent at this point) and then back! What made it extra special was the large assortment of geese poo everywhere. It did keep my mind off the pain b/c I was intently looking ahead for good hand placement.

We had a delicious dinner that nite at Morton's to celebrate my beautiful mom. Both of my parents are out of this world wonderful.

Sunday was church and then another meal before they headed off... even with the workout, pretty sure we were a positive on the weight scale for the weekend.

This weekend started off last nite with a sweet women's nite at my church. We ended the studies that go through out the school year by having a get together where anyone who wants to can share what the study revealed to them or how God worked through it. There is just something about women worshiping and women in unity, hearing heart-break stories and heart-warming ones that just feeds the soul.

It is possible that my brother might come today for a visit... woo hoo. He is over at the boat, in northern Indiana, so b/c of the weather he may vacate early and head this way... we'll see. Either way tonite is a dinner out! woo hoo - I know you'd think after last weekend I'd be content eating in for a while... but after a week of eating meals in... I'm always ready for a weekend meal out on the town.

Gonna leave shortly and take RB to the groomer then I go too :) at 11... getting my hair cut and colored... found this pic of Ellen Pompeo and think I like the color...

Next weekend... since I'm on a roll here... we are going to a wedding! I love weddings! I don't even have to know the people well and I get excited. I do know the groom, but know his sister more so. Chad actually worked with the groom through the golf world... and I grew up w/ the groom b/c his sister and I were great friends. We will get to see family and friends, so looking forward to it.

So guess this is the weekend run down posts... past, present, future.

Hope ya'll have a wonderful, and ideally sunny weekend!

Fact Amidst Fiction

2011-05-09T20:09:00.003-05:00

Since the age of 3, she knew me as her momma… she knew my ways, she knew my love, she knew me. And it was a dreadful August nite, 9 years later, when they took her from me… telling her it was my doing. I had assurance at first that she knew better, but as the days became weeks and the weeks months… I began to wonder how firmly she was standing in my love amidst a situation that presented ample opportunity for doubt. She was taken, beaten, starved, left alone, cold, at times completely forgotten.

My search for her was relentless but she had no way of knowing. And my knowing of her torture is only in hind sight – for a day came, 142 days passing, when my eyes held hers again and the joy of our love rose high above her broken frame. Her knowing of me, her prior days intertwined with mine, echoed strongly my love for her, it was all enough to hold her faithful that I was seeking, I was longing to find, to hold, to love again.

Love amidst the sunny days is sweet; love that remains through storms forges past real and into ecstasy.

All Along playing by Remedy Drive.

10 minutes

2011-04-28T18:34:00.001-05:00

When you have 10 minutes...
Ideally alone, quiet ones, w/ maybe a cup of tea or coffee...

Click here...
Collecting Blessings

Come on...

2011-04-19T17:26:00.000-05:00

SPRING!

So glad the weather last week was more spring-like cuz I had some special people visitin'

These are my friend Greta's children. Her hubby was downtown for a conference and her and the kiddos came to see us! We had a great time and RB got spoiled... love u G!

Declare

2011-04-16T09:19:00.002-05:00

I have a journal I recorded in when I was going through the separation from my husband... and it is such a great tool for me now as I go through this unsettling time w/ my health. It feels like God gave me more faith to believe him during my separation than I have when it comes to my health. Could possibly be that I let all else go more w/ that situation and clung more to him than I do w/ my health in to which I more easily have the attitude of just closing my eyes and praying it will be over soon. I believe that going through the separation actually gave me much needed strength to help my mind stay on course when it comes to my health. If I hadn't seen God pull my marriage out from such a dark place- then i couldn't have the knowing I do that he can pull my health out too! It is a truth that does wonder for a soul that is easily wearied.

I was rereading the journal today, and gained encouragement from the 9.24.09 entry called "Declare."

For I know the plans I have for you declares...
Declare as in these definitions...

state emphatically and authoritatively
announce: announce publicly or officially
state firmly
authorize payments of; "declare dividends"

And my two favorite definitions listed:
designate (a trump suit or no-trump) with the final bid of a hand
make a declaration (of dutiable goods) to a customs official

I hear the word declare over every other word in Jeremiah 29:11.... God declaring it to the "Customs Official," which in this case is the enemy, that God has the final word on the plans for my life... I am reminded to guard the boundary! To not let untruth in... and how the Father longs for me to declare with him... You know the plan! You have paid for me in full... the victory is secure. - Take heart! In this world you will have trouble, but I have overcome the world. I am not home yet... the prince of the world has rule for a while... but my life was bought back - Romans 12:2 and be not conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, for you're proving what is the will of God -- the good, and acceptable, and perfect.

And be encouraged by the final bid of hand definition. You have the final word and it is..."For I know the plans I have for you," DECLARES the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," DECLARES the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," DECLARES the LORD, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."

Faith p/u; SHLD for today comes from Charles Spurgeon's - "He who fights w/ the precious blood of Jesus fights with a weapon that cannot know defeat."

Song playing is Head over Feet by Alanis Morissette

in the kitchen

2011-04-09T17:50:00.000-05:00

When i was out today the car said it was 71! And it felt warm too! It was great. Sun made a showing and still shining too so that is an added bonus.

Have dinner in the works...

Gonna saute onions, yellow squash, and zucchini. And then C is gonna grill this flank steak that's been marinating all afternoon in 1/3 c of red wine, 1/3 c. olive oil, 1/3 c. soy sauce, 2 minced garlic cloves, and pepper.... mmmm (although raw meat grosses me out - but it will be mmmm when it is cooked)

No idea why on this 71 degree day i wanted to make chicken soup, but it sounded good... sauteed onions, carrots, and 2 sliced garlic cloves (salt/pepper) and then added in diced white wine turkey actually - already baked from the grocer... ended up adding just enough low sodium chicken stock (about 3 cups) to fill the pan and let it simmer for 30 min... it really isn't soup, but I can tell from the sampling I've done it is going to make a flavorful lunch tomorrow.

C and I have been loving shakes lately too... and we've been having this one for breakfast... I make this then put it in the freezer for about 20 minutes before eating... i know it sounds weird but it has a snicker bar taste... must be the cashews... this recipe makes servings for 2.

2 c. almond milk

1/2 c blueberries

1/4 c. cashews

1 scoop vanilla protein powder

3 icecubes

I have one sometimes too in the afternoon or evening but I usually do the almond milk, a big tbsp of almond butter, 1/2 c grapes, protein powder, and ice. (One great trick too is to keep the fruit in the freezer.)

tea time :)

2011-04-09T08:46:00.002-05:00

Cloudy here today but suppose to reach the 70s! Gotta love that! Still having my morning tea... got a new one this week...

Was looking through pics this past week and thought I'd share the snow pics from our storm this winter!

C and I live in an apartment... if you look closely in this last pic all the way to the right you can barely see the balconies sticking out... we live in the opposite corner, down across from this huge snow pile, which was the absolute last thing to melt mid March! Here's a last fall view of our apartment w/ rainbow added :)

I read Kelly Sauer's blog and have her link on the side bar... but she posted a pic of her office this past week and I'm following suit. I work from this little corner every day and of course this is where I post my blogs... :)

Closing out my tea time picture post w/ some of RB... here he is trying to not look at the camera when he knows I'm trying to take his picture

And C happened to come home while I was snapping away, so here he is waiting on C to round the corner - tail waggin'!

And then chewing at the handkerchief cuz he hates it... he'd already chewed it off once but I put it back when i decided to take his pic.

C and I actually looked at 2 homes this week! We renew our lease end of this month and saw a couple good deals in our neighborhood and thought why not look... one is definitely a steal - but decided to stay put for another lease... and hoping come January we can start looking for a place to call home for a while...

He settles the barren woman in her home and makes her a happy mother of children... Praise the Lord! ~ Ps. 113:9

I watch over my word to perform it. ~ Jeremiah 1:12

WOO HOO!

2011-04-07T17:24:00.000-05:00

work it girl

2011-04-05T22:36:00.002-05:00

yes this is me... at crossfit, and it is not me, cuz i am so not competitive! i use to be! but it has left me - i can work out w/ a group of people and genuinely not care that I look a fool! instead I'm actually proud of myself and ecstatic that my body is moving and grooving at whatever speed! woo hoo!

today's workout was a doozy! hardest one thus far... sometimes the mere warm ups and cool downs seem to make a perfectly doable workout in my mind, but then there is the core workout in the middle! today's work out started w/ a half mile run! and ended w/ a half mile run! this would have made my second time doing a running segment of a workout - but since I flailed around like a green bean the first time i ran, I opted to modify this part and switch to the rowing machine instead...

i won't bore ya'll w/ the workout, will let you know I'll be sore some tomorrow and then lots more thurs - SO thankful to be working it!! he he

Chariot

2011-04-04T12:32:00.003-05:00

Once our eyes are opened by God, we will see all the events of our lives, whether great or small, joyful or sad, as a "chariot" for our souls. Everything that comes to us becomes a chariot the moment we treat it as such. On the other hand, even the smallest trial may become an object crushing everything in its path into misery and despair if we allow it.

The difference then becomes a choice we make. It all depends not on the events themselves but on how we view them. If we simply lie down, allowing them to roll over and crush us, they become an uncontrollable car of destruction. Yet if we climb into them, as riding in a car of victory, they become the chariots of God to triumphantly take us onward and upward.

~ Taken from the April 4th entry in Streams in the Desert - L.B. Cowen
Children of God by Third Day playing... "We r the saints, we r the children, we've been redeemed we've be forgiven... we r the sons and the daughters of our God!"

On a different note, rooting for Butler tonite! After Purdue lost to VCU - I really didn't have anyone I was cheering for, but VCU won my heart... they were so scrappy - and just go getters! I was a bit bummed to see them get SO close! So Purdue, VCU, and now ending it w/ Butler... the nite will tell!!!

Medium

2011-04-01T21:48:00.005-05:00

Year plus ago now, I was making my bed one morning. As I stood on the window side, with the light coming in, I saw an "M" sticker on the other side of the bed. You know those little clear stickers w/ black sizing that come on clothes? Well, the nite before I'd bought some new things and one of the "M" stickers was left stuck on the other side of the bedspread.

I went around to the other side to peel it off and didn't instantly see it... so then I felt for it thinking I'd feel it. Nope. So looked more intently b/c I knew it was there... crazy sticker. Had to go back to the other side, and w/ the sun behind me, I instantly see it again. Then literally kept my eye on it all the way to the other side and even at that, that little M sticker blended right in almost disappearing.

In the trial, you know when life is dark and you can't understand anything... Peace says Faith has a vision in this darkness. Faith is letting my heart trust that this situation is never going to be explained in my reasoning and striving and searching for an answer. Faith stops my striving to find the "M" sticker - evidence of what I'm searching for, and shifts my weary heart to the other side of the bed to strengthen it w/ a trust and knowledge that from that side of things, everything is perfectly clear - my darkness is perfectly bright. Faith is darkness of soul, anchored to the Light of Jesus.

You light my lamp, Lord. The Lord, my God!, illuminates my darkness. ~Psalm 18:28
Be glad for the good things the Lord is preparing for you. Be patient in trouble. Always prayerful. ~ Romans 12:12

Song playing is, "I Won't Let Go," by Rascal Flatts.

i heart him

2011-03-30T19:40:00.001-05:00

It is the weekend!

2011-03-26T10:33:00.001-05:00

And i'm home, just made me some tea in my new mug i got from starbucks last weekend when we were downtown. Isn't the lid brilliant! I always put a little plate over my tea when it steeps and thought this was just the coolest :) Of course I almost didn't buy it b/c I do that... i'm at a store and I think oh that is nice... then I think on it long enough to decide why it is i don't really need it. But C was with me and when I came back to the line w/o it - he was like, "Go get the mug!" lol

On the agenda today, a 1:00 workout w/ C at CrossFit. I am SO THANKFUL TO THE LORD! for HELPING me through these workouts, I'm amazed really. My health and I have not been getting along and for those of you out there PRAYING FOR ME - THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART! I have been so encouraged by the prayers, people I know and don't know. God has graciously made me aware in some of the neatest ways of how people are praying and it is one of my greatest encouragements! I have run many test and had a surgery and still am having pain - there have also been some not so good happenings w/ my surgery that I'm still trying to seek God on b/c I do not know what the heck he is up to and just trying not to lose my mind but instead have FAITH.

I've said before, I read the Morning by Morning devotional by Charles Spurgeon. When I do, I write down at the bottom this little ditty...

Faith p/u; Shld

In 2009 I had a dream and in it I was at a friend's house and her brother was there and he told her to tell me what a stronghold was... (girl has some dreams I tell ya) but when she did she said, "A stronghold is picking up the wrong thought and laying down the right one."

I woke up and wrote that down and have not forgotten it to the point that it helps me WATCH MY THOUGHTS. So in the morning after I read the devotional (Confession here, I don't do this every morning - sometimes I don't leave myself enough time) but, when I do, I write down my FAITH pick up and my stronghold let down (Shld) - (After writing it for a while I realized "Shld" made me think "shield" and doing this is exactly that... it creates a shield around our minds so that we can practice choosing life!)

When you have pain in your body... there are lotso! lotso! opportunities for you to listen to the wrong thought. So when those come, I remind myself of my faith p/u - shld and I USE IT! Sometimes the phrase is short and sweet - like "God is w/ me" and sometime it is longer and I'll even go back to the book during the day and reread it. But it keeps me tuned in to what I'm telling myself and when the thought is one that is contrary to the truth - I simply lay it down and p/u the FAITH I wrote down in the morning - like one of my favorites "Your promises have never failed before, Lord!"

Do still have b-ball on the brain this weekend. Watched VCU play and win last nite and then KY beat Ohio State. We root for big-10 teams in our house, but I was off the band wagon last nite cuz I'm not a sullinger fan and KY had prettier uniforms - this is why I don't fill out brackets - cuz things like this factor in.

Shout out too to the Hatchets, my h.s. team is playing in the state tournament today in Indy. See all the fb posts and our small hometown is probably packing the place out - Go Hatchets!

My tea is getting cold.

Before I go gonna leave ya an encouraging little poem for anyone reading whose marriage is struggling - a poem by Ruth Harms Calkin... If your marriage is in the valley - HOLD ON - and BE PATIENT... just do those two things EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY! You will make it!

Song playing is Beautiful by Francesca Battistelli.

Remind Them Gently
O Lord
Please talk to them -
This beautiful couple
Whose marriage is disintegrating.
God, they've known so much of beauty.
They've endured so much of pain.
They've laughed together, wept together.
They've groped through appalling darkness
Upholding each other step by step.
They've suffered together, triumphed together.
They've planned and prayed together.
Now, dear God
Before it is too late
Remind them gently, Lord
That two lives so intricately woven
Into a blended pattern
Can never be wholly separate lives again.

Jayden Michael

2011-03-24T16:23:00.000-05:00

Took this pic last nite of Jayden Michael... born Friday 3.4.11 at 12:50 AM. He was 7 lbs, 8 oz and 21.5 inches. His momma is Larissa, the one on the far left of this pic...

I shared some of her advice back on this post... A-Z Post - At the time of this post, (Nov. 2009), Larissa had miscarried her first baby 3 weeks prior. She wrote to me in an email these encouraging words...

"Jesus is to be Lord over our lives. That means Christ is in charge, our ruler, master, reigning over us. We need to watch out for Satan's darts of discouragement, doubt, despair, depression, distraction, dissatisfaction, deception, and dead desires. Satan always comes to divide, deceive, and destroy. But Jesus comes to heal, comfort, save, and restore!"

Had to share Jayden Michael w/ ya'll - holding him this week was sweetness!
Song playing is "Glorious Day," by Casting Crowns.

Where you at?

2011-03-20T23:25:00.001-05:00

Might be my only stretch to play this Jennifer Hudson song I like :) cuz not sure where the Boilers were tonite? Guess we'll have to wait on them to deliver an NCAA championship. It was sad to see their season end tonite... so fun watching them play hard all year, despite scores. Here are some pics of our favorite team!!

BB

2011-03-20T14:37:00.001-05:00

B #1 is for baptisms...Had 3 at church this a.m. and they all shared their testimony briefly which teared me up. after the first one, i had tears and even told myself, ok let's just listen less lightly for these next two and not get so drawn in, is that weird? doesn't matter, i cried for all 3, they were just surreal

the second one was the h.s. pastor who was baptizing his mom, uugghh so that was a tear jerker, but also reminded me of my sister-in-law, Jenelle's baptism. we were going to a church at the time that let you baptize someone you knew and I got to baptize her... sweet stuff

B#2? any march madness guesses? C and I are vegging, watching michagan/duke - but leaving shortly for downtown again :) in the rain :( we will be watching purdue play at 7:10 and hopefully win!

Might take my good camera and post a pic later.

Tomorrow is...

2011-03-19T22:32:00.001-05:00

spring! woo hoo! - well, maybe, high for tomorrow is 51 w/ thunderstorms and by Friday, high reaches a whopping 37... just keep it above freezing

we had a lovely day today, kinda cool still but sunny and C and I were downtown! wanna see the pic i took this a.m. from our room on the 18th floor?

so tiny... not sure what happened there... wishes for everyone to enjoy a great start to spring tomorrow!

Song playing is "Firework" by Katy Perry.

Spring... how i long to do what u do
brown, gray, dead
to bright
colorful
new

Let it Snow!!!

2011-01-08T15:45:00.003-06:00

Not a big fan of the cold. One of my main drawbacks to moving to the Chicago area was the snowy cold. Well... we are on our 3rd winter now and, while I still don't enjoy being cold, I'm developing true love for this season.

There is such a peace and quiet present outside when the whole ground and trees are blanketed w/ snow. I have been reminded this year of God's questioning of Job from chapter 38. The whole chapter is God showing his sovereignty, and vs. 22 does so w/ this question regarding the wintering white powder, "Have you entered the storehouses of snow....?" Job 38

Over and over in this chapter God reminds Job... "I am God and you know nothing of my ways."

Where I live there is an open area where lots of snow glistens and it has a couple times already this season caught me off-guard as I've glanced that way and been reminded of God's storehouses of snow to which I know nothing about and, because of the gift of winter, can only scarcely grasp their beauty and stillness and awe.

All this to say, the snow around me has prompted me to take a blog break for the winter, or at least while the snow rests on the ground, which around here is usually on and off until March or so.

I love to blog! And will miss it many times over! But here's to a snow inspired winter siesta!

"Far Away," playing by Nickelback.

Track 7

2010-12-29T16:10:00.003-06:00

Got a cd from our pastor... he sent in the mail while I was recouping from a surgery. Isn't that thoughtful? It was a CD of worship songs from our church and I've fallen in love w/ #7.

If you attend church, I pray you are blessed w/ amazing worship. I attend a very large church so we have different leaders each week... and of course I have my favorites, but genuinely love the worship every single weekend... and #7 happens to be one of my favorite leaders... something about her voice, even as I listen to the CD... not paying attention, her voice will come on and when #7 hits I instantly just go to a different place inside, a happy one :)

My last post on my attitude? That day was better, but honestly, for a girl who battled depression in college, to the point of going on prozac... I know what depression feels like, and sometimes I think it just hits me in smaller waves. And the last few days... it's been waving at me. But it is ok... not to make light of depression, hopelessness... FAR FROM IT... it is hell. But I have simply been saying to the literal onslaught of downer thoughts... "God sees... my help is around the corner..." It is my simple faith rebuttal.

And listening to this song is good medicine too... as well as some CDs I have of Joyce Meyer. Not to mention that LIVING Word of the LIVING God... and the verse he gave this a.m. that has carried me well today was Romans 12:12...

Be glad at the things God is preparing for you! Be patient in trouble. Always be prayerful.

Since I've opened this can of worms... the other thing God has taught me more of in the heaviness of these last few days is his sovereignty. He is sovereign and even in the bad, demands praise... deserves praise... not b/c he's mean like that, but b/c there is such an infinite amount of good that surrounds him and is him, that we need not waste breathe on the "death" present in this temporal arena.

Deut 30:19 I set before you life and death... CHOOSE life.

Since I don't have it as a song to play for the post, here's the lyrics to the song and this tiny tid bit of it I found online...

O BLESS THE LORD
Psalm 103; Psalm 30:4-5
~Lindsay McCaul Pritchett

Bless the Lord, O my soul
Let every breath proclaim
Blessing to Jesus' name
Bless the Lord, O my soul
Don't let yourself forget
All of His benefits

Though we are sinful
He heals our disease
And when we are captive
He sets us free

Weeping may last for the night
Joy comes in the morning
With mercy the Giver of Life
Remembers His children
In kindness He takes our transgressions
As far as the east from the west
All that He does is blessed
O bless the Lord

Bless the Lord, O my soul
Your days are fading fast
Only his fame will last
Bless the Lord, O my soul
His love will never end
Trust your unfailing friend

I have my favorite lines... what are yours?
http://www.songdiscovery.com/filemanager/files/audio/75/10.mp3

Morning...

2010-12-27T06:57:00.001-06:00

It was a Merry Christmas in many ways, yet the last 2 days were an onslaught of poor thoughts and a terrible attitude. I was in the bathroom at my mother-in-laws yesterday, before anyone had even gotten up and told myself, "Your attitude sucks" (is I believe how I put it)... "change it..." But then I saw someone... ... ... happened to be my husband first and my attitude hadn't changed... yesterday was a roller coaster.

I hope today isn't.

Here is a song, for no reason, just gonna listen to it some as I work today... along w/ this verse which I cut out last nite from a card a friend sent me last month... it is a promise I'm gonna repeat often today too.

My people will live in peaceful dwelling places. Isaiah 32:18

Song, "Walk on the Water," Britt Nicole.

Dance on!

2010-12-20T17:00:00.001-06:00

After I wrote my last post, my mom and I decided to follow suit with my dad and spend that evening in the hospital w/ my grandma. And as God would have it... the three of us and my dad's younger brother Mark were at her bedside when that last breath came.

I'm a song gal. And in the last 2 years especially... I'm blessed as heck w/ how God sends me songs... a little time had passed there in the hospital room, after her passing... and calls were being made, text being sent... and I'd made my way over to her side again to just take her in... and I was singing in my head a song and didn't even realize it... it is like my heart starts the melody and it takes my head a few seconds to even clue in... this is how it is.

I was singing... "What can wash away my sin... nothing but the blood of Jesus... what can make me whole again????"

And it was the sweetest song for the moment... cuz once my head wrapped around my heart's song, it instantly made me think my Grandma had already witnessed the Glory of the Lord and that was the song she was dancing to.

I was looking up another song just now by Ronnie Freeman and the first song that popped up was his version of this song... my song for the post. In honesty, not really my taste... but it was so lively and kind of country-like and her and I are small town girls at heart so this one is for her.

"Nothing but the Blood!!!!!!" by Ronnie Freeman.

C.E.W.

2010-12-14T19:41:00.001-06:00

These are the initials on the front license plate of her Buick... Constance Elaine White. Not sure how old the car is, not new but not super old... but can't have many miles on it. It was one of those cars she'd deem "dirty" and I'd have to really go searching. Her home is the same... always tidy.

I grew up w/ her next door and from a little girl to my last visit there, I don't ever recall anything out of place. She is a blessing of a woman... beware of that amazing smile, b/c despite it you are going to hear exactly what it is she may want to say. I admire her.

I'm sitting at my parents' home tonite... her house still next door only she isn't in it. Hasn't been since September. In that time she's been in and out of the hospital and nursing home battling congestive heart failure. The door here at my parents' just closed... my dad leaving to spend time at his mother's side. She isn't responsive now... and her body is slowing turning off.

I was able to spend some time w/ her this past week. She has been enduring the process of dying and while it has been hard to watch her suffer, she's done it with courage.

With CHF, there were many time these past few months where she'd just fill up with fluid in her chest and she'd literally feel as if she was choking... and anxiety was always right there, as one can imagine. I remember after one of the episodes her sharing so openly and honestly... "I love the Lord and I always imagined dying in such a peaceful way... feeling his presence right with me. But when I have those episodes, it feels like I might die and I don't feel him, and I don't feel peace." As she shared I saw the honest, questioning, slightly scared heart of a child in her just shy of 88 year old eyes.

I am thankful that she shared her struggle and also thankful that while pain has been present... being w/ her in these last days has also allowed me to witness God's faithfulness to her. As the final days are upon her, there has been God's peace. She isn't responding any more... but when she was her words were often to the God she loved... I already told ya she says what she means so she would tell him she was ready and to stop being poky... and she also prayed, "Bless 'em good, bless 'em real good." And I know that meant each and every loved one she will be leaving behind.

Love you, Grandma.

Connie at Jones and Sons ~ 2008

"You are Good," playing, by Gateway Worship.

Shadow Promises

2010-11-01T22:30:00.006-05:00

Promises and shadows... a shadow isn't the real deal, but it is proof that the real deal exists. I was working today and looked up to see this shadow on our living room wall... the bar stools from the kitchen and the blinds from the bay window and the leaves from the tree on the other side.

As I write this now, I'm looking at that same wall and it is blank. Hard to believe the above picture was just there this morning. And a promise is much the same, it commences only for a moment. It'll speak to your heart and gives you a flash of awe. But then it too disappears from sight and if kept, can only be done so by faith. If you go back looking for it with your eyes you will see nothing and ignorant disappointment might set in. Don't let the sweet time of the promise be ruined by thinking it will always be as presently powerful as the above shadows on the wall. The promise was just a brief beginning point, a miracle really, only seen b/c the Lighting was just right...but it too vanishes, giving way for the mysterious co-laboring process to unfold indefinitely, for no one knows in advance the moment when faith becomes sight. One can say sight is inevitable. Because there was a promise.

Maybe you are living w/ lots of shadow promises. BElieVE! Don't let anything cause you to lose your faith. God desires to use those shadowy promises to grow our faith in order that we might hold the real deal! Every part of the journey is good... the mercy-filled promises, to God's patience, forgiveness, faith, and power freely given as he labors w/ us, and his beyond height or depth love of gifting us w/ eyes to see them and hands to really hold them... sharing in his victory, how amazing.

Revel at any promise given. Dance like mad in the shadow seasons of co-laboring in faith. Let your heart be overwhelmed w/ joy knowing the dark shadowy promises themselves are proof of something real and tangible yet to come.

Love never loses faith. ~ 1 Corinthians 13:7

Song playing, "With All I Am," by Hillsong.

3m 52s

2010-10-28T12:11:00.000-05:00

With all your might...

2010-10-25T21:37:00.005-05:00

It is ok Weary warrior. God knows and the mistakes you think you made are only going to beat you up for a little while longer, revelation is around the corner. And in his goodness you'll hear him speak in some special way... "I purposed you to be right here... mistAkes and all." You'll find him at your lowest and you'll have never felt so high. So free and secure in one breath. And in the elation there will be an installing unbeknownst to you of patience. It is a needed gift he'll give that will allow you to gather up every ounce of strength and purpose yourself now, to wait on him. There will be thoughts that come, exalting themselves up against the Word of God. They mean nothIng. They'll always encourage speed, but you were already given the treasure of patience, obey. Rest in this one on whom you wait. He keeps his promises and will noT delay.

The fire trucks are comin' up around the bend. ~ Alanis Morissette.

But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. ~ Romans 8:25

I know the plans, declares the LORD... ~ Jeremiah 29:11.

El Shaddai - God All Sufficient

2010-10-16T22:49:00.001-05:00

I think this is an older song by Rush of Fools, but I heard it for the first time this week on pandora.com. I like that first part, I should be drowning in the Red Sea tonite... but I'm only drowning in your love.

I've mentioned before how I spent quite a bit of time teaching students on Moses. I taught 3rd grade in Indiana and the Bible curriculum was Moses... then taught 2nd grade in Florida... Bible curriculum, Moses.

And it is something to put yourself in his shoes... standing there at that Red Sea... army on your heels flying in for the attack, Red Sea in front. Such a predicament. And what amazing faith. What amazing trust that God would come through.

What looks impossible in your life right now? Put Moses on the stand and sit with me and listen to him retell his day at the Red Sea. Trust that the same God he believed in for deliverance is ours too. Faith is the gift that allows us to stop looking at the visible Red Seas blocking our path and instead remain focused on the Deliverer... not mistaking invisible for insufficient.

Then Moses and the people of Israel sang this song to the LORD: "I will sing to the LORD, for he has triumphed gloriously; he has thrown both horse and rider into the sea. The LORD is my strength and my song; he has become my victory. ~ Exodus 15: 1-3

But now, O Israel, the LORD who created you says: "Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine." Isaiah 43:1

Give me an "S"

2010-10-09T07:39:00.016-05:00

I live in arrogance w/ the theme, "I Say." I don't say. I am lost. I am lost, loved. And it is the loved ending that defines miraculous. There's a mountain of doubts that make up the lost me, A girl-Thomas is fitting, always stirring and whirling striving to explain the ugly and fix the broken, find the answers to the whys. Then the Very maker of mountains who intercedes! and gifts! me w/ a faith that whispers to the ears he formed... "I got this." With my still needed follow-up assurance, "I promise." This unseen, needless wonder. His promises shield me, his faithfulness unyiElding, it always wins how it wants to. His wins, not like our wins. For he alone crafts lost souls into redeemed ones. He wrote salvation. I mean craziness, he authored salvation! He sees, and he says. And my light burden as his saved?... love him, love his beloveds. There are flocks that roam his mountains, let us unite and love because he loveD us... miraculous.

Sing a new song to the LORD! Let the whole earth sing to the LORD! Sing to the LORD; bless his name. Each day proclaim the good news that he saves. Publish his glorious deeds among the nations. Tell everyone about the amazing things he does. ~Psalm 96: 1-3

May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Jesus Christ, so that with one heart and one mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. ~ Romans 15:5-6

Song playing, "Breathe," Mercy Me, instrumental.

Needs

2010-10-04T21:41:00.002-05:00

In the sermon 2 Sundays ago now, the pastor said something that has stuck. And it was...

God doesn't have any needs.

When he said it, my gut reaction was... opposition... I thought, "Well of course God has needs." But then chewed on it and shortly after agreed, "Right, God is needless." And that has been a source of sweetness to me since hearing it because I am SO needy!

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. 1 Peter 5:7

Song playing is "We Cry Out," by Gateway Worship.

A couple videos

2010-09-30T06:48:00.010-05:00

My church kicked off their women's ministry studies last night and while waiting for everyone to arrive videos were playing on the screen... this song was one of them and it is still on my mind this morning. Hope everyone's gearing up for a beautiful day, it's been gorgeous weather here! I love that!

Can you believe the last day of September! Excited b/c C and I are going to see 10th Ave North tonite along w/ Addison Road! (are u reading Sue? I'm gonna see funny Jenny tonite!) and one of the worship leaders from our church is opening for them! Here is her voice in a video response to the earthquake in Haiti.

What's he have waiting?

2010-09-23T18:46:00.000-05:00

I bought a gift for a friend a few weeks back now and will be giving it to her tonite... as I've walked past it these past weeks, it sitting on the table in the small entry we have, it always brings joy to my heart at the thought of giving it to her.

This waiting has also been a sweet reminder... that God has his own entry table... w/ gifts thought out in advance for us. I want to be excited to receive, trusting in the heart of this good giver. I'm amazed at how much he's given already and how I still so strongly doubt his love.

Have to share the best line of the day from that "Morning by Morning" devotional - Charles Spurgeon.

When their spirit is lively and their hopes bright, they think God accepts them, for they feel so high, so heavenly-minded, so drawn above the earth! But when their souls cleave to the dust, they are the victims of the fear that they are no longer accepted. If they could only see that all their high joys do not exalt them, and all their low despondencies do not really depress them in their Father's sight, but that they stand accepted in One who never alters.

Looking forward to the good gifts he has waiting for me. Who cares where I am, it is God who is on the move, a Father ready to bring it!

Song playing, "He Moves Mountains In Me," by Jenny Phillips.

Shine like stars, singing his songs.

2010-09-18T22:17:00.005-05:00

Song for the post is "Starry Night," by Chris August (You tube of it on side bar)

"A star shines light from within... not like the moon which only shines b/c it reflects light. God's children are like stars... we don't have to reflect the light of the things around us... we exude God's light from within us, through the power of the Holy Spirit." ~ Denise Lash

The power of the one who raised Jesus from the dead is living in us, and as a result we have no need to muster up our own might. Our great need is to fall before an almighty Father day and night and to plead for him to show his radical power in and through us, enabling us to accomplish for his glory what we could never imagine in our own strength. ~ pg. 60 of Radical by David Platt.

"People go to their graves never having sung the song God put in their hearts... too worried about what others might think or fearful themselves to just sing out." ~ Lance Wallnau

Sing joyfully to the LORD, you righteous; it is fitting for the upright to praise him. Praise the LORD with the harp; make music to him on the ten-stringed lyre. Sing to him a new song; play skillfully, and shout for joy. For the word of the LORD is right and true; he is faithful in all he does. The LORD loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love.

By the word of the LORD were the heavens made, their starry host by the breath of his mouth. He gathers the waters of the sea into jars; he puts the deep into storehouses. Let all the earth fear the LORD; let all the people of the world revere him. For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded, and it stood firm. The LORD foils the plans of the nations; he thwarts the purposes of the peoples. But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations.

Blessed is the nation whose God is the LORD, the people he chose for his inheritance. From heaven the LORD looks down and sees all mankind; from his dwelling place he watches all who live on earth - he who forms the hearts of all, who considers everything they do. No king is saved by the size of his army; no warrior escapes by his great strength. A horse is a vain hope for deliverance; despite all its great strength it cannot save. But the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine.

We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD, even as we put our hope in you. ~ Psalm 33

Have Faith

2010-09-11T08:16:00.002-05:00

It is the fact that God sees our faith that gives it all its power.
Doesn't matter if a universe-size ball of doubt sits on top of a mustard-size seed of faith.

So don't give one hoot about the doubt, discouragement, fear, bitterness, or regret that might be pressing down flaunting its size... God does mustard-size.

The apostles said to the Lord, "Show us how to increase our faith."

The Lord answered, "If you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mulberry tree, 'May you be uprooted and thrown into the sea,' and it would obey you!" ~ Luke 17: 5-6

*****

Where is there another God like you, who pardons the guilt of the remnant, overlooking the sins of his special people? You will not stay angry with your people forever, because you delight in showing unfailing love. Once again you will have compassion on us. You will trample our sins under your feet and throw them into the depths of the ocean! You will show us your faithfulness and unfailing love as you promised to our ancestors Abraham and Jacob long ago. ~Micah 7:18-20

Song playing is "Hosanna," by Paul Baloche.

Carolyn Kay

2010-09-09T22:43:00.001-05:00

Getting ready to hit the hay... Saints 14-9 :)

Carolyn Kay is my mom and she is maybe getting close to Indy... left here around 8pm after spending 3 days here with me. She's left a void here tonite... no girl movies and chatting... no morning juice tomorrow... and carrot throw-up for lunch...her favorite, lol... (I know I'm prompting questions to arise)... no partner in crime during the work-day... but she's left me a clean apartment, a full belly, and lots of love in my heart.

Song playing is, "Isn't She Lovely," by Stevie Wonder. I can't remember why today... but I was singing it in the kitchen... and then in looking it up, see it is a song he apparently wrote about his newborn daughter... and lovely too is the bond I have for the woman who brought me into the world... she is a beautiful, hard-working, funny... inspirational woman - SO grateful for her. (Thanks for sharing her w/ us this week, dad!)

The Rescue

2010-09-06T11:54:00.014-05:00

Being rescued is passionately romantic and dauntingly scary. There is his arm reaching down into the pit... there is faith to reach for him, there is the ride up and out, which is always timed by the rescuer, and most enjoyed by the one being rescued if her gaze remains on him. Cuz there is the inch between her breath and his where the reality of the rescue exists, the grimy walls exposed, and oh so much reeling by out of her control... it is the dauntingly scary part where she just wants to close her eyes. But there too is her hand tightly on his strong arm... his around her waist... and that gaze.

The inch and the gaze are both real.

But the gaze is truth, and the inch is shrinking.

Song playing is "My Beloved," by Kari Jobe.
Picture found at this website.

That's Fishy

2010-08-31T20:13:00.008-05:00

Sea Bass fishy, so it's all good.

Me to the kitchen is like the student who has to study their butt off to get the A. And effort mixed w/ planning doesn't always equal a good grade. Giada De Laurentiis is probably my favorite to watch. She seems to absolutely love everything about food and makes preparing it seem effortless.

Well let me tell ya about the most effortless, delicious thing that graces my kitchen and it is fish of all things. Here's a pic and don't mind the gray onions... I bought reds this time thinking it would look good w/ the orange carrots, but Chef Shannon learned... uncooked red onions... nice pretty purple... cooked red onions... yeah... so from now on i'll stick to the sweet ones.

Here's a link to the recipe... yummo!

It's not on the weekly menu, I think April was the last time I made it cuz it is a bit pricy at $22/lb. The piece I bought this round was 3/4 of a pound and I'll get 3 meals from it, 2 smaller portions and an average. The changes I make from the link are... I saute the veggies first and lower the butter, onions, and water to 1 1/2T, 1, and 1 1/2 cups. Then after boiling for a bit I add some garlic and then the spices I use are just salt/pepper and lemon zest that I put right on the sea bass before pouring over the carrot/onion/garlic mixture. (I salt/pepper the onions and carrots prior to cooking too... Giada always says to season each layer :) And then a 3/4# piece I cooked at 375 for 15-17 minutes, and it just melts in your mouth. Hook, line, and sinker.

The first time I made this was last summer and it was my first try of sea bass... it puts the years of salmon to shame! I've tried ordering it out only a couple times since then and I'm telling ya this recipe is an A+. I did C- it once when I forgot to preheat the oven and had already poured the boiling C/O mixture on the fish... it wasn't the best that round, but other than that it's about the greatest taste-for-the-effort combo I've found.

Song playing is "I'd Rather Be w/ You," by Joshua Radin. C just called and looks like we are gonna end this day getting some custard at Gramps... I get the "Hot Tub," vanilla custard w/ their homemade fudge sauce, bananas, and whip cream. My fave meal and dessert all in one day... happy girl.

In the Clouds

2010-08-30T19:50:00.000-05:00

they were such a wild mixture of bright white ones and darker gray/blue ones, and blue sky shining in too... the whole array was a picture for me to choose what to focus on... it is all here, the white glorious revelations, the darkness of the unknown, the promise of bluer skies ahead - and the sweet reminder that you are the same in each... pure love I cast up my cares

Song playing is Rich Mullins, "Hold Me Jesus."

Wives... need some encouragement?

2010-08-23T22:53:00.003-05:00

This did it for me this morning!

An excerpt from "Pray Big for Your Marriage," by Will Davis Jr.

Jim and Nell Hamm, married just two weeks shy of fifty years, were enjoying one of their frequent day hikes in Prairie Creek Redwoods State Park in northern California. Jim, age seventy, and Nell, age sixty-five, found hiking to be a great way to enjoy each other's company and exercise at the same time. But on January 28, 2007, their routine outing turned tragic. A young mountain lion suddenly and viciously attacked Jim, locking his head in its mouth. Nell, keeping her wits about her, grabbed a nearby log and began beating the animal on the head. When that had no apparent effect on the lion, Nell grabbed Jim's ballpoint pen from his pocket and began jabbing it in the animal's eye. She struck the cat with such force that the pen actually broke in two, but the enraged animal still wouldn't release its death grip on Jim. As a last resort, Nell again grabbed the log and attacked the cat. After several minutes of intense battle, the cat let go of Jim, gave Nell a long stare, and then turned and walked away.

Jim survived the attack, and Nell was hailed as a hero and credited with saving her husband's life. Jim, recuperating from his hospital bed, spoke of his wife's courage: "She stood in there the whole time. If she hadn't, I would be gone... No doubt about it... I'd be gone." Nell was quick to dismiss claims of any heroic action on her part: "You hear remarks of hero," she said, "It wasn't that. We love each other very much... and we just fought together like we do everything."

Ladies, in this chapter, I'm (Will Davis Jr.) asking you to fight for your husband. I'm asking you to go to battle against the powers in our culture that are well positioned to devastate men's lives. I'm asking you not to be naive about what your husband struggles with every day and to rally to his side. I want you to gain a vision of the kind of man your husband can become. I want you to pray for a picture of what God intends for your husband and then pray for that picture to become a reality in his life. I'm asking you to become your man's number one fan, supporter, believer, and, most important, intercessor.

Hebrews 10:23-24 Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promises. (L.O.V.E. that!) Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works.

Playlist song is "How Deep the Father's Love for Us," by Joy Williams. Thank you, JESUS!!! for hanging in there for us! We echo Jim's words, "You stood in there the whole time. If you hadn't, we would be gone... No doubt about it... we'd be gone..." Our enemy of today is your defeated foe of yesterday. Give us wisdom to abort his crafty schemes. Help us love our husbands... remind us they are your precious children, a far cry from our enemy.